"Good thing Greg Olson is catching all the hell. Otherwise, people might start calling me out."

The Bucs offense has been a train wreck from the word “go” this season. The thought of that putrid performance last week against the Jets makes Joe want to kick the empty Caybrew bottles across his living room.

Offensive coordinator Greg Olson doesn’t want to run the ball. Michael Clayton (when he does play) doesn’t want to catch. King of Turds doesn’t want to block.

Joe could go on but you get the idea.

It’s because of this Connie Chung-offense that Woody Cummings of the Tampa Tribune believes there may be massive changes to the Bucs offensive coaching staff in 2010.

Q: I highly question the wisdom of Morris’ plan to “establish the running game.” Why, after 13 games of mediocracy does he believe that within the next week or two he can create an new identity for the team whose identity has been established as one of ineptness? Morris and company seem overwhelmed and unable to right the ship. Does the present coaching staff have the knowledge, skills, understanding and experience to bring about the necessary changes to make this a winning team in 2010?

A: I’m not sure we have the answer to your question yet. All we can go by is the results we’ve seen so far and they’re not encouraging. However, the defense is playing better since Raheem took over and the team seemed to draft rather well last year. Going by that you could certainly make an argument for Raheem and Mark Dominik to stay. Still, some changes will have to be made. The offense has been the biggest disappointment. I think that’s where heads will roll, if heads roll.

— Woody Cummings

The Bucs offense has been so horrid of late, it’s enough to flare up Joe’s acid reflux. While Joe was quick to point out how horrible defrocked defensive coordinator Jim Bates was, and how rotten offensive coordinator Greg Olson’s play-calling has been, Joe seems to think offensive line coach Pete Mangurian is getting a pass for a unit that has grossly underperformed this season.

Joe hates when he thinks like a cynical old journalist. He much prefers to think like a courageous young man.

But cynical Joe can’t always help himself.

Earlier this week, Jeff Faine and Jermaine Phillips gave strong blessings of support for Raheem The Dream to the local media.

Now Joe has to mention that, ironically, Phillips and Faine easily are among the Bucs with the most to lose if Raheem The Dream is fired.

Phillips, after having a good 2008 season cut short by yet another injury, saw his offseason free agent tour net nothing but a return trip to Tampa for a paltry one-year salary. It’s very likely that his only chance to play in the NFL next season is with a Bucs team led by Raheem The Dream.

Faine was the Bucs last big free agent signing, joining the team before the 2008 season with a six-year, $37 million contract. It was reported by the St. Pete Times that he had $12 million of that guaranteed. And per USA Today, that’s what Faine earned in 2008.

So it stands to reason, that with a lucrative contract following a subpar 2009 season marred by a triceps injury, Faine could be someone a new regime would look to trade or release.

Joe just felt compelled to get that off his chest, although Phillips and Faine are likely being genuine in their loud support for the head coach.

Mike Florio, the creator, curator and overall guru of ProFootballTalk.com discusses the implications of Redskings owner/tyrant Danny Snyder hiring Bruce Almighty and the expected connecting of the dots to Chucky.

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"Hey Deuce, you wanna learn to surf on the Potomac?"

When he’s not spreading agent-driven speculation, The Mad Twitterer of the St. Petersburg Times spends his time covering the Bucs.

Like Joe, he too can connect the dots on this morning’s happenings with Redskins owner/tyrant Danny Snyder hiring Bruce Almighty. In fact, The Mad Twiterer is convinced Mr. Gruden is going to Washington.

Over the past few months, you can imagine Allen and Gruden at the 19th hole in Avila, where they both own homes, plotting their return to the NFL over a few cold ones.

Redskins owner Daniel Snyder needs to hire a proven head coach with a Super Bowl ring after the failed experiment with Jim Zorn, who will be fired at the end of the season. . There’s a few of those men available — Mike Shanahan, Bill Cowher, Mike Holmgren and Gruden.

It’s hard to imagine those other men would sign off to have Allen run the football operations. Gruden, on the other hand, would probably insist on it.

The Mad Twitterer later writes how, if he were either Bucs coach Raheem the Dream or general manager Mark Dominik, he would be a bit nervous right now.

Welcome to the club, Mr. Stroud.

"Shanahan, man, don't they realize John Elway's not a Redskin."

Citing one of his countless faceless sources in the bowels of the NFL heirarchy, Mike Florio, creator, curator and overall guru of ProFootballTalk.com, is reporting Chucky is not the first choice to replace Jim Zorn as head coach in Washington.

Per Florio, Mike Shanahan is in line for the job.

No doubt Florio’s sources are excellent, especially now that he’s an MSMer with NBC.

However, Joe has to wonder whether this might be a ruse to play Chucky’s agent against Shanahan’s.

Bucs fans can only hope.

For those not fantasizing Chucky will soon coach the Redskins and the Bucs will sign a new head coach, the Bucs-Seahawks game likely will be played in some nasty conditions in Seattle.

The current kickoff forecast is 49 degrees with a 60 percent chance of rain.

What that all means is anyone’s guess.

But Seattle is notoriously one of the loudest and toughest places to win in the NFL. Joe suspects it’s even tougher when the weather sucks and you’re 1-12.

It seems Warrick Dunn prefers Atlanta over Tampa Bay.

Pat “Vacation Man” Yasinskas, of BSPN.com, is reporting Dunn has bought a share of the Falcons.

“It’s interesting because Warrick, to my knowledge, never officially turned in his retirement papers. Arthur Blank and he are very, very close,” Yasinskas said speaking on 1040 AM this morning. “Much like in Tampa, Warrick was a huge part of the community up there. I’m not at all suprised by it. …Arthur Blank still owns at least 90 percent of the team.”

Joe wishes Dunn nothing but the best.

Joe has no clue whether a minority owner can play for his team. And while it’s doubtful Dunn would return to the field, it’s an interesting question.

"Hey, Bob LaMonte, you f'ing better have a g-damned buyout clause in my contract with those jackasses at BSPN! Don't you understand how disgusting it is to smell Chris Berman's sweaty body odor? Jimminy Christmas!"

Earlier this season Chucky made a big deal of his “exclusive” contract he re-upped with BSPN to cheer lead on Monday Night Football.

Chucky gave the impression that not only was he burned out from coaching but he wanted to stay with BSPN.

Joe believed that about as much as he believes Rachel Watson lays awake at night pining for Joe.

There’s no way Chucky’s agent agreed to any contact with any TV outfit that bound his client. There’s no way BSPN is paying him for part-time work as much as Chucky would make from Danny Snyder or any other NFL team for full-time head coaching duties.

If that actually did take place, Chucky’s agent is barely one step up from a moron. Joe is of the belief that there is a buyout clause of some sort in his contract with BSPN.

So Joe found it more than curious that when BSPN was contacted by Mike Florio this morning, the creator, curator and overall guru of ProFootballTalk.com, BSPN had no comment on the specifics of Chucky’s contract.

As is often the case, silence sometimes speaks volumes. If Chucky was indeed bound to BSPN, why wouldn’t the Disney mice crow about it? They sure as hell like to brag about the non-stop river of sewage that flows out of Bristol, so why clam up about this?

No, Chucky is not roped to BSPN.

"Man, I hope Tiger will still come hang with me in Washington."

Joe believes America will soon learn Chucky’s new contract with Monday Night Football was nothing more than a Byron Leftwich-like smokescreen and just a way for Disney to be sure Chucky didn’t run off to join NFL Network.

BSPN.com NFC South guru, Pat “Vacation Man” Yasinskas, seemed to be of the same mind during an interview this morning on 1040 AM. 

Vacation Man was asked whether Chucky would follow Bruce Allen to his cozy new football czar gig in Washington, and Vacation Man seemed to believe that was a given.

“Ya gotta wonder. I don’t want to get in trouble with my employer. I don’t know exactly what Gruden’s contract is with Monday Night Football,” Yasinskas said. “At some point John Gruden wants to coach again. With Bruce Allen going there, lets’ be real honest, it’s everyone’s first thought. I don’t know if [Gruden’s] contract prevents him from coaching next year. We’ll soon see.”

Joe is pleased to wager a case of Caybrew that Chucky is already on a three-way phone call with Brian Griese and a Century 21 broker in the Beltway.

Mike Florio, the creator, curator and overall guru of ProFootballTalk.com goes into detail about all the ills of the Bucs, and how they became such a “mess” in a calendar year.

Florio also predicts the fate of Raheem The Dream near the end of the video.

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Joe has long believed when Chucky returned to coaching, the likely stops would be Dallass or Washington.

When the Redskins began circling the drain earlier this year, Joe was pretty convinced Chucky would wind up as the next Redskins coach.

A few weeks ago Joe heard rumors that Bruce Almighty and Chucky would go to Washington in a package deal. Well, it seems the first shoe has fallen.

Earlier this morning Redskins owner/tyrant Danny Snyder canned longtime puppet Vinny Cerrato. It took just a matter of minutes for Snyder to name Cerrato’s replacement.

That would be Bruce Almighty, reports Rick Maese of the Washington Post.

Vinny Cerrato has resigned as the Redskins’ executive vice president of football operations, the team announced Thursday morning, and it appears Bruce Allen, the son of former Redskins coach George Allen, will take over as the team’s top executive.

Allen, whose hiring was reported by radio station ESPN 980, served as a senior executive with the Oakland Raiders from 1996-2003. He then was general manager of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers from 2004-08, when he and Coach Jon Gruden were ousted in a sweeping, season-ending change.

It’s just a matter of time — three weeks perhaps? — that the Redskins bring Chucky into the fold.

And we all know what taking Chucky’s salary off of Bryan and Joel’s payroll means for the Bucs.

"Allen, man, you get me $7.5 million, Ike Hilliard and a house next to Dick Cheney's, and I'm there."

Team Glazer might be a little excited this morning.

Jay Glazer (no relation), of FOX Sports, one of the most reliable NFL reporters around, is reporting the Redskins are talking to former Bucs general manager Bruce Almighty about their new vacant position of VP of Football Operations.

The guy previously in that job, Vinny Cerrato, quit this morning.

Redskins coaches were told the team is now in talks with former Bucs and Raiders head honcho Bruce Allen to replace Cerrato, FOXSports.com has learned.

Does anyone believe that Bruce Almighty (currently on the Bucs payroll) would go to Washington and not offer Chucky (currently on the Bucs payroll) a huge contract to coach the Redskins?

As Bucs fans know, if that scenario played out, the Glazers might be much more inclined to send Raheem The Dream pakcing in favor of hiring Mike Shanahan, Bill Cowher, Mike Holmgren or Bill Parcells to run the Buccaneers.

UPDATE 10:15 AM: ProFootballTalk.com, via Adam Schefter of ESPN, is reporting the Redskins have hired Allen. …There are unconfirmed reports that Brian Glazer is buying pizza for everyone at One Buc Palace today.

After Joe realized Jenn Sterger and her friends weren’t going to watch FOX News with him on his couch last night, Joe put on his research hat for a while.

Joe was thinking about whether Raheem The Dream will be able to have some late-season success. After all, the head coach did learn his craft under Chucky, who has a notoriously poor record after Thanksgiving.

For his career, Chucky is 21-31 in December-January regular season games.  By comparison, Tony Dungy was 17-9 with the Bucs in those games.

Joe looks at these final games as a massive and telling test for Raheem The Dream. He’s got two winnable games in front of him and a bunch of players familiar with failure at the end of a season.

Can Raheem The Dream break Chucky’s tradition? So far, he’s 0-2.

"Who says I'm unstable?"

No, to the best of Joe’s knowledge, Raheem the Dream is healthy and vibrant. His tenure as Bucs head coach is something entirely different.

That’s the gist of Clark Judge’s piece of the status of certain NFL head coaches on CBSSports.com.

In Judge’s view (not to be confused with Mike Judge or Matt Drudge), Raheem the Dream very likely has dug a hole for himself he may not be able to climb out of.

Unstable

Raheem Morris, Tampa Bay:
Everywhere I go I hear the same refrain: This guy is in over his head. Well, no clue, Sherlock. He was a 32-year-old secondary coach one year, a head coach the next. Jim Zorn couldn’t make the jump, and now it looks as if Morris can’t, either.

All I know is the guy opened the season by firing his offensive coordinator. OK, a little odd, but it happened in Buffalo and Kansas City, too. But then he fires his defensive coordinator during the season. Wait a minute. A coach fires both coordinators in his first year on the job … and in their first years on the job?

What in the name of John McKay is going on? Trust me, the Glazers would like an answer, too. Reportedly, they’re embarrassed by the way Morris is handling the club, and I can’t imagine they were all that enthralled when one of his players said he thought Morris was “a little bored” with the job. Hmmmm, imagine how bored Tampa Bay fans are.

In nine games this year the Bucs produced no more than seven points in the first half, and last week they not only didn’t score in the first two quarters, they produced 15 yards. Pathetic. If Sominex needs a spokesman I know a head coach it can contact.

I always wondered how you fire someone after only one year on the job, but Morris is making a convincing case.

It’s hard for Joe to decipher just what Bryan and Joel think because, short of a radio host claiming they were involved with a felonious financier, Bryan and Joel are very good poker players.

If Joe is to believe the rumors, the Glazers are hurting for money. So this piece of information should be of import to them.

Alex Marvez of FoxSports.com has a list of the NFL’s most overpaid players, and two Bucs made the list: seldom-used running back Derrick Ward and forgotten starting quarterback Byron Leftwich.

4. Tampa Bay RB Derrick Ward
A 1,000-yard rusher for the New York Giants in 2008, Ward is one of the few players the tight-fisted Bucs signed to a big free-agent contract (four years for $17 million with $6 million guaranteed) in the offseason. Ward, though, was beaten out for a starting role by Cadillac Williams and is clearly second fiddle in the backfield. Ward has 84 rushes for 304 yards and one touchdown.

10. Tampa Bay QB Byron Leftwich
Leftwich squandered what may be his final chance at being a full-time NFL starter. He was benched after Tampa Bay’s first three games and is now on injured reserve (elbow). Leftwich earned $2 million in base salary. He won’t be around to collect a $3.5 million roster bonus due in March.

Joe can’t really call Leftwich overpaid because the guy got hurt. And if one really wants to be objective, the way rookie quarterback Josh Freeman has struggled recently, the Bucs would have been better off with Leftwich behind center.

Jeff Faine is the latest Bucs player to plead for the safe return in 2010 of Raheem the Dream.

If Raheem the Dream is feeling the heat from his brutal Bucs awful ways, he sure isn’t showing it.

But his players must be feeling the heat because they are starting to come out of the woodwork to support the rookie coach.

First it was linebacker safety Jermaine Phillips. Now, The Mad Twitterer of the St. Petersburg Times brings word that Jeff Faine is also stumping for Raheem the Dream, claiming firing the rookie Bucs coach would be “unfair.”

“I think he’s done great. I really do,” Faine said. “For the first year, I think he’s done as good of a job as he could when you think about all the turmoil we’ve had, all the changes and things. And I give him kudos and credit for having the guts to make those changes as well. I think a lot of people in this position of being a first-year head coach, how do you fire both the offensive and defensive coordinators in the same year? With a first year general manager? I think it shows a lot of guts and a lot of confidence for them to say, “Hey, we made a wrong decision, we’re trying to right this ship and we’re trying to get it right and make the transformation and head in the right direction.”

Faine went on to say he cannot blame Raheem the Dream for the cluster that was the hiring of the coordinators because Faine wasn’t sure whether those hires came from high above at One Buc Palace.

Fair enough. But for Joe, the next two weeks will show if Faine is in the minority or not.

Chris Hovan and co. on the defensive line will get to face a rookie center in his first start and a practice squad right guard on Sunday in Seattle

The Bucs improved defense should be salivating for Sunday’s game in Seattle.

The Seahawks announced today that some fresh meat is coming the Bucs’ way. And Seahawks coach Jim Mora, Jr. has no qualms about telling the world on a Wednesday.

Mora told his media throng today that he’s not worried about the Bucs’ game planning to play against his offensive line that will feature two rarely used players Sunday.

Mora announced today that rookie Max Unger, a second round pick, will start at center. He previously was playing right guard.

“Rather than play the coy game and make you wait til Sunday to see what we’re doing. I think it’s better just to just come out and tell you. So that we all know. And with that we take the risk that our opponent will be able to game plan, but we don’t think that’s really an issue,” Mora said.

(Uh, why is not not an issue? Is Mora not fearful of the Bucs defensive coordinator?)

“Max Unger is going to start at center for us. He played center in the preseason in the second half of most of the games. We think that eventually he’ll be a very good center in this league. And rather than wait til the offseason to make that move, we’re going to do it right now. So he’s going to play center for us.”

Mora also said second-year right guard Mike Gibson, plucked from the Eagles practice squad in October, will see his first significant action of the season.

“[Chris] Spencer is going to play some right guard along with Mike Gibson, who we are going to get into the rotation,” Mora said. “We want to see what he’s capable of. We’re going to split reps with Chris Spencer and [Gibson].”

These second-team Seahawks may be excellent players, but Raheem The Dream should be able to exploit their inexperience.

Another test for the head coach.

Jermaine Phillips has launched a personal campaign to try to save Raheem the Dream's job.

Joe is so knee-deep in football thought and daydreaming about a scantily-clad Rachel Watson, Joe tends to forget the looming political campaigns of 2010.

Though mid-term elections are not quite 11 months away, Bucs linebacker safety Jermaine Phillips has already started a campaign.

Raheem the Dream Again In 2010

Maybe sensing that the Bucs head coach is on dangerously thin ice, Phillips has begun beating the drum that Raheem the Dream needs to return next season, so reports eye-RAH! Kaufman of the Tampa Tribune.

“Raheem is going to be just fine … just bear with him,’’ Phillips said Monday. “Before the season starts, we fire our offensive coordinator (Jaff Jagodzinski), so you don’t get a full training camp with the offense you want to run. Then we’re playing a new defense that’s not working. Since Raheem has taken over, you’ve seen the defense is playing better. It’s night and day. We’ve got a rookie quarterback (Josh Freeman), so we know we’re going to have some bumps on the road. You tell me what rookie quarterback hasn’t had growing pains? You can’t judge Raheem off one season. When he got hired, a lot of the good coordinators were already taken. What do you expect him to do? We all make mistakes. Raheem saw his mistakes and tried to correct them.’’

Maybe Phillips isn’t aware, but his campaign to save his head coach may have only a shelf life of two weeks.

Many Bucs fans, disgruntled over how the Bucs have crumbled under Raheem the Dream, are secretly hoping somehow former Pittsburgh Steelers and Super Bowl-winning coach Bill Cowher comes to rescue the Pewter Pirates.

For those fans, Joe brings you this video from Mike Florio, the creator, curator and overall guru of ProFootballTalk.com, who discusses what the immediate future holds for Cowher.

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The conversation on Earnest Graham’s Tuesday radio show turned to the subject of human growth hormone use in the NFL.

The unapproved substance is known for its performance-enhancing qualities and can be used to hasten recovery for an injured player. 

Graham didn’t hold back his thoughts when peppered with questions about the topic by host J.P. Peterson, host of “Happy Hour With J.P. Peterson” of 1010 WQYK-AM. A great community servant with an impeccable reputation, Graham has the attitude that HGH is just part of life in the NFL for hundreds of players.

JoeBucsFan.com has transcribed the audio.

“They don’t have a [drug] test for [HGH]. It wouldn’t shock me if a ton … I’d say a lot of NFL players are doing it,” Graham said. “I would say, I’ve heard a lot of people, even in Hollywood the average person is [using] HGH. It’s supposed to be this great thing. Especially in a sport like football. You know, I would assume that a lot of guys have access to it and are using it. I would assume so. I wouldn’t doubt it, man, with what’s at stake. Especially in this game, not having guaranteed contracts you know with so much riding on your performance, a game that tears your body down like that, I would assume that a lot of people are making that decision to use HGH. Especially if there’s not a test for it. Because at some point you feel like you’re not cheating, you’re not doing anything wrong. I would say definitely. I would not be shocked.”

“I mean, you know, sometimes. It gets done by, you know, just knowing a guy. Seeing how it benefits another guy. That’s how it ends up, you know. Most guys don’t have access to it, don’t know how to go about it, probably won’t take the time to check on it. So usually another guy refers it, you know, to someone and that’s how all that starts.

Graham went on to say that he doesn’t “understand the whole steriod thing” and just that certain guys are just prone to experiment with HGH or other drugs and supplements.

“Any sport, guys come across injuries and need to get back fast and come back stronger than they were before. I wouldn’t be shocked. I don’t know that I’d really make a big deal about it if I heard it. It’s kind of understood for me at this point,” Graham said.

“Not a test for [HGH]. I don’t think a guy would think it’s cheating. No. I mean they know it [is cheating]. But I don’t think it registers. …I would say 30 percent [are using HGH]. I have no idea how to come across it. Not that I’m looking for it. I don’t know anybody. It’s not something that a guy would just, unless you really trust a guy, to open up and talk about. You know what I mean. …I’ve heard a guy talk about HGH but not [that he’s doing it].”

Graham went on to say he doesn’t believe  any NFL player would admit to using HGH.

“A lot of guys are kind of proud guys and don’t want to feel like they were cheating. Me, myself. I would feel like I’m cheating,” Graham said.

Joking about his all-but-eliminated role in the Bucs running game Graham joked, “Maybe I’d cover punts better if I was on HGH.”