In a refreshingly honest statement that likely sent shivers up the spine of Bucs new media relations director and former Republican strategist Jonathan Grella (Joe noticed the other night that extreme cutie Margaret Hoover, who likes to bounce up and down in her chair when she gets excited which Joe finds to be a guilty pleasure, was referred to as a “Republican strategist.” Joe figured if that label is good enough for that hottie Hoover, then it’s good enough for former beltway insider Grella), erstwhile Donald Penn replacement Demar Dotson claims he’s not ready to be a starter.

Yet.

Dotson, green, raw but huge at 6-9, 315, has very limited football experience. Either the Bucs are doing a fine spin job on the former basketball player or Dotson is impressing just about everyone but himself with his play in OTAs and minicamp.

So much so, with Penn’s immediate future very much in doubt, the Bucs have thrown Dotson’s development into overdrive, so documents Anwar Richardson of the Tampa Tribune.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers offensive line coach Pete Mangurian spent at least 15 minutes Monday morning working individually with left tackle Demar Dotson.

Dotson has received all the first-team reps this offseason because Donald Penn, a restricted free agent, refuses to sign a one-year tender worth more than $3 million. The extra work for Dotson is necessary because he has limited football experience and even Dotson isn’t sure he’s ready to protect the blind side of franchise quarterback Josh Freeman.

“I’m not saying I’m a good left tackle. I don’t even know if I’m a starting left tackle or not at this moment. If you ask me, I’m not,” Dotson said Monday, after the first practice of mandatory minicamp. “I’m working at it, taking these reps while Penn is away and I look forward to Penn getting here soon and protecting Josh’s blindside.”

Why is this refreshing to Joe (more so than watching Hoover bounce up and down?) far too often Joe hears athletes of all sports spout off how they can do (X). Yet when given the opportunity, they stink worse than a goat.

In Joe’s eyes, if the Bucs actually believe Dotson is that talented and Dotson believes he needs more work, that tells Joe that Dotson is a perfectionist striving to be the best he can be.

In that scenario, everyone comes out a winner.

And it doesn’t take a Democratic lapdog to figure that out.

Earlier today Joe lamented some ridiculous bottom attire on the Bucs cheerleaders during Saturday’s FanFest. Joe’s a traditionalist, so he much prefers this look below. Enjoy that, along with additional sights from FanFest.

The Bucs cheerleaders also danced in their more traditional shorts Saturday. Joe's more old school than a Fashionista. Photo by Kyra Hallet, JoeBucsFan.com.

Richard "Batman" Wood, whose poor health and hard times have been well documented over the past few years, was all smiles for fans on Saturday. Photo by Kyra Hallett, JoeBucsFan.com

If the Bucs move the chains consistently this year, surely Greg Olson will have the Bucs over a barrell for a new contract. This family seems to be big fans of the offensive coordinator. Photo by Kyra Hallett, JoeBucsFan.com

While some might speculate Bryan Glazer was smiling at the thought of not paying Chris Hovan $4 million this year, in fact, Glazer was grinning after a fan told him to "go get'em Glazer." Photo by Kyra Hallett, JoeBucsFan.com

With mandatory minicamp starting today at One Buc Palace, Joe knows many, if not most, Buccaneers are savoring one thought: the end of minicamp on Wednesday afternoon.

That’s when the players are cut loose before having to report on July 30. In other words, it’s party time for most of the guys, especially this young roster. Time to hit tropical beaches and gorge on native cocktails and hotties, or disappear with the new honey you just met in South Tampa before returning next week to disappear with her friend.

Of course, some of the guys will be enjoying treasured family time. And one of those Bucs will be single dad Davin Joseph.

In a rare story (not column) by Martin Fennelly, the Tampa Tribune’s top columnist, he wrote today about Joseph winning custody of his 6-year-old son, changing his life and working to be a role model.

Joseph won’t go into details, but he sought custody of Richard when he felt Richard’s situation in South Florida wasn’t good. His parents frankly asked him if he was really capable of changing his life. But Joseph always remembers what his father told him, that what’s done is done, but “all you can do is become as responsible as you can.”

“It takes a lot of looking in the mirror,” Davin Joseph said. “Sometimes I want to go out with my friends, and I do, but not much. Sometimes I want to go out and eat, but I can’t. It’s me and him.

“I love him with all my heart. And I didn’t want to have to answer to my son years from now when he asks why I wasn’t there for him. I kept thinking, what if he asks me, ‘Daddy, why didn’t you come and get me?’ What am I supposed to say, because I was too selfish to fight for you? I wanted to be a role model.”

Now Joe’s not about to gush over Joseph doing the right thing and transforming into a responsible adult. But it’s still great to read and worth sharing.

Joe knows there will be haters who read this Tribune story and blast Joseph for having two kids in two states and no wife, but Joe doesn’t fall in that category.

It’s the first day of summer. It’s June. It’s (mandatory) mini-camp. Kickoff for the opening game of the 2010 season is 11 weeks away.

So read into the following Twitter post from dapper Rick Brown of the Lakeland Ledger what you will.

Seems as though there’s something interesting in the Bucs secondary. More importantly, something interesting not in the Bucs secondary.

Not sure if it means anything yet but Sean Jones “started” at 7-on-7 at safety opposite Tanard Jackson.

Again, may not be a whole lot to read into that, but Joe wonders if Raheem the Dream is sending Sabby the Goat a message?

Or has the message already been sent?

You may be familar with his work with Mike Florio, the creator, curator and overall guru of ProFootballTalk.com. You also may be familar with the videos he does with the lovely Tiffany Simons for NBCSports.com.

He is Gregg Rosenthal, who also is an executive at Rotoworld.com. Rosenthal took time in-between moving to a new posh apartment in Manhattan to answer some of Joe’s questions about the Bucs’ upcoming season.

JoeBucsFan:  It seems as though the Bucs are relying on a lot of rookies to play at least average football, all but anointing their first four draft picks, defensive tackles Gerald McCoy and Brian Price, along with wide receivers Arrelious Benn and Mike Williams, as starters. How dangerous is that?

Gregg Rosenthal:  Playing rookies is fine. Saying they will start before you even see them in pads is very dangerous. Tampa is forced in some ways to take this approach because of the roster, but you have to see how the rookies perform before handing them spots. You also get the sense the Bucs will see what they want to see with their young players. Even if Price isn’t ready, the staff may convince themselves he is.

Joe:  If memory serves, you are high on Williams as a sleeper at wide receiver. How much can he help out Josh Freeman?

Gregg:  Williams is extremely talented and should help long-term. I like him better than Benn if he can show maturity. I’m dubious regarding how much either player will help Freeman this year. Perhaps long-term Freeman, Williams, and Benn grow up together. It’s more likely one of those receivers will be a bust. The organization is making life a lot harder on Freeman by not having more veteran options to play with.

Joe:  The coordinator debacles on both sides of the ball last year have been well-documented for the Bucs. Since both Jeff Jagodzinski and Jim Bates were jettisoned, both by midseason, does that give Raheem Morris, in your eyes, a fresh start? In other words, do you believe last year was just a write off and he is starting anew with a clean slate as far as his job security?

Gregg:  I don’t think he gets a fresh start. A head coaching job is ultimately an executive position. Morris made terrible decisions with his two biggest hires and felt forced to can them within a year. That doesn’t reflect well on him; why do we think he’ll make better hires next time around?

I do like that he’s responsible for the defense. That’s what he excels at and the team should use his strengths. With all that said, he’s in trouble if he goes 3-13 again. Show some progress and he’ll be fine.

Joe:  What’s your take on the running back position for the Bucs? It seems as though the Bucs are deep at running back, but deep with average backs who are pretty much clones of each other.

Gregg:  I don’t think they are clones. Ward is a complete back and should be better in the receiving game than Williams. Ultimately, I think he’s better in short-yardage too. They are a solid combination. I think you can win with those running backs – they aren’t the problem. The Bucs won a Super Bowl with Pittman and Alstott. Put Ward and Williams on the ’02 Bucs and they still win. It’s just unrealistic to expect Ward and Cadillac to carry the team without big improvement from the offensive line.

Joe:  Can’t conduct an interview with you without asking about your co-worker, the lovely Tiffany Simons. Is she just eyecandy or does she really know football? It’s almost unladylike for a Florida girl not to know something about football.

Gregg:  She really knows her football. She went to Florida State, so she may know college football even better than the pros. But she knows the NFL very well; fantasy football helps everyone get to know the third receiver on the Jaguars. We have a ton of fun working together and we’re good friends. She was at my wedding.

Joe:  A lot of people know you from your videos on NBCSports.com and of course from your musings on ProFootballTalk.com. Here’s a chance to pimp for thousands of football fanatics. Tell us about your gig with Rotoworld.com. What do you do there and why should football fans go there?

Gregg:  I’m the managing editor there, and basically help run the football coverage for the last 7 years. We are covering player news 24/7/365 and I don’t think there’s a more comprehensive place for timely news. We’ve grown a lot since NBC bought us four years ago and I’m proud that a lot of our traffic is for news, not just fantasy football analysis. We also have our draft guides available with rankings and all that jazz if you need help with your fantasy draft.

Bucs general manager Mark Dominik apologized for his off the record inference that Donald Penn should utilize Valerie Bertinelli's dietician.

Joe thought it was interesting that at FanFest Saturday night with a small gaggle of reporters, Mark Dominik apologized on the record for a remark that he made off the record that seemed to be on the record.

Or something like that.

If you are scoring at home, Dominik spoke to an invitation-only group of season ticket holders and prospective season ticket holders last week at One Buc Palace. There Dominik told the gathering that last season, Donald Penn’s physique did not transform in a way that would mirror Valerie Bertinelli’s weight loss practices, so reports Tom Balog of the Sarasota Herald-Tribune.

“That was insensitive and that’s why I apologized to him,” Dominik said. “Donald is an important member of this football team and a guy that I’m extremely fond of. We had a good heart-to-heart conversation.”

Dominik thought that he was speaking in a private gathering when his conversation was recorded and put out on the Interwebs. As the old saying goes, you can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube, though the recording was taken down.

Was the gathering a private setting (in which Dominik had no reasonable expectation of his comments being recorded)? It’s a gray area. The Poynter Paper, the bastion of American journalism ethics, apparently thought not, running with the story last week. Joe, after a few phone calls and e-mails, determined Dominik was recorded without permission, so Joe voluntarily took his link to the recording down.

Joe later received several calls from MSM people — both radio and print — telling him that in fact Dominik was on the record, despite what the Bucs media relations office proclaimed. One call Joe received was from a former Bucs player unaffiliated with Joe in any way who told Joe that every year, players and NFL team executives are instructed that any time they speak to any group, that they should expect their words to be picked up by a reporter.

In short, a public forum is when anyone has access to a speaker. When the Bucs paraded to various chambers of commerce gatherings last week, anyone willing to pay for a ticket could walk off the street and listen. That is a public forum.

Joe was instructed in college if a setting is not a public forum, and if the speaker is not asked if he can be recorded or if the speaker does not know what the recording will be used for, then it is off the record.  

(Joe’s journalism ethics professor even went so far as to say getting a free hot dog while covering a game is unethical because you are being paid off. Seriously. Frankly, Joe’s not that easy. It takes more than a hot dog to pay him off.)

So even though Dominik’s little incident is a bit of a gray area regarding whether he should have expected a degree of privacy, Joe chose to err on the side of caution, which is why he removed his posted quotes from the audio.

Now that we have that straightened out, anyone wishing to bribe Joe for a comfortable sum of money can e-mail him at joe@joebucsfan.com.

Speaking of the aforementioned Ms. Bertinelli, Joe once had a massive Rachel Watson-like crush on Valerie Bertinelli when he was a kid. In her day, she was the hottest brunette on TV. Then she went off and married Eddie Van Halen. Man, talk about a dude having a golden touch!

Though the two are no longer a couple, to this day when Joe tries to blow out his eardrums by cranking out Van Halen’s Unchained on his iPod, often a twentysomething Valerie Bertinelli comes to mind (sigh).

Since Joe brought up Eddie Van Halen, he’s still getting the job done in his 50s.

How good is Barrett Ruud?

The debate has raged on for a couple of years about the “quarterback” of the Bucs defense, as Raheem The Dream calls him.

Some esteemed analysts think Ruud is a manbeast who recorded a career high 142 tackes last year. Others think he’s overrated and needs to learn how to shed a block and make big plays. Still others are undecided.

Tampa Tribune veteran scribes Roy Cummings and eye-RAH! Kaufman take on the subject of Barrett Ruud in their latest Bucs Video Blog, better known as a Vlog in cool guy circles.

Joe won’t spoil the video for you, but one of these beat writers thinks Ruud’s “got a Pro Bowl in him.”

Yeah, yeah, yeah. In case you just got out of bed and forgot to look at a calendar, it’s Father’s Day. Joe’s already sick of hearing about it and the afternoon has just begun. At least Travis Henry and Antonio Cromartie should be busy today.

Since it is Father’s Day, Joe guesses he has to have a token homage to the day. For those that hold the day special, Joe encourages you to read Anwar Richardson’s touching Tampa Tribune story of Bucs general manager Mark Dominik and his famly.

For something more related to the Bucs, Joe brings this BSPN video of James Wilder, Jr., one of the most coveted high school recruits in the nation. In case you haven’t put two-and-two together, Wilder is the son of one of the greatest running backs in Bucs history, James Wilder.

Here, Wilder speaks with vodka-swilling Dana Jacobson about his dad and football.

OK, Joe knows this is a Bucs blog, so Joe is stretching the Bucs connection on this one. But it’s so good Joe couldn’t pass it up.

Former Bucs secondary coach Herm Edwards is one of the most buttoned-up, straight-shooting coaches who ever graced an NFL sideline. A strict upbringing in a military family, he sent his son Marcus to a Catholic high school (Clearwater Central Catholic to be exact).

So the thought of Herm hanging with Jimi Hendrix is a bit of a stretch. But that’s exactly what happened, in a matter of words.

Herm, who seems to be trying to outdo super agent Ralph Cindrich in the number of Twitter posts daily, confessed this morning on his Twitter feed that he watched Jimi Hendrix at the infamous Monterey Pop Festival.

@DaRealKingKong:  best musician of all time?

@HermEdwardsESPN:  Jimi Hendrix, I saw him live june 18 1967 at the monterey pop festival.

@korykozak:  wait … Jimi lighting his guitar on fire?! You saw that?! Wow!

@HermEdwardsESPN:  Yes!!!

For some reason, Joe just can’t picture Herm jamming with Jimi. Just can’t. But it’s way cool to think that Herm is one of the handful of people still alive and who can still remember seeing Jimi Hendrix.

Joe is of a younger generation. Joe has seen Eddie Van Halen three times, the first in his heyday when the band that bears his name was the Tyrannosaurus rex of music. Watching Eddie Van Halen do things with his guitar that mere mortals should not be capable of doing — and laughing at the same time — was clear evidence to Joe of a supreme being.

At any rate, for a taste of what Herm saw live, by the magic of YouTube, here’s Hendrix at the famous Monterey Pop Festival in 1968.

Photo by Kyra Hallett -- JoeBucsFan.com

Joe couldn’t resist some one-on-one time with Horace Copeland, who electrified Tampa Stadium during his rookie season as a Bucs wide receiver in 1993. Copleland was signing autographs at Saturday’s FanFest with many Bucs alumni, Scot Brantley, Batman Wood — the list was long. Hi-C surely looks like he’s in game shape and ready for Monday’s minicamp.

Joe: If you could have five minutes with the Bucs’ heralded rookie receivers to give them advice, what would you tell them?

Horace Copeland: I would tell them to learn as much as they can. Don’t come in thinking you know it all. Because sometimes you come in and have a big chip on your shoulder. There’s a lot to be learned. And if you’re willing to be open minded, and learn to increase your skill, you become a better receiver.

Joe: You’ve watched Michael Clayton’s struggles and his fall from a great rookie season. At this point, what do you think he has to do to rise above and succeed? What’s your take on that?

Copeland: Sometimes you try be a leader of the receiver club; sometimes you put too much pressure on yourself. It’s a team effort. And the only thing you have to do is stay focused. Clayton should stay focused on the basics: catch balls, run good routes and you can’t control everything else. He has to stay focused on things he has to do, and I think he can survive and be a better receiver, if he just doesn’t put too much pressure on himself.

Joe: There was a lot of talk last year about poor chemistry with receivers and quarterbacks. The Bucs used three quarterbacks, really four if you count all the snaps Luke McCown got in preseason. Now they have Josh Freeman in place for an entire offseason. Does that really make a difference?

Copeland: It makes a huge difference. Absolutely. I remember back in the day in the offseason, not the minicamps. But Trent Dilfer and I would go out there, nothing mandatory, we just wanted to get better. So we took some of our spare time to work on the things we needed to work on, so we could get familiar with there. And then season comes along and we’re on the same page. …You do that, like Freeman was doing. You get more familiar with each other, and that’s how magic happens.

Joe: What are you up to these days? Do you live in town?

Copeland: I’m in Hernando County. I spend a lot of time with the family, and I do a lot of work with juveniles trying to encourage the kids who are dealing with a lot of issues. And I really enjoy that, So that’s what I’m doing right now, and I’ve been doing that for years. And I’m just spending more time with family.

Embattled Bucs left tackle Donald Penn showed up at Bucs fanfest Saturday night at the CITS and spoke on the record about Bucs general manager Mark Dominik’s off-the-record remarks about Penn last week.

Per Tom Balog of the Sarasota Herald-Tribune, Penn is “disappointed” with Dominik.

Penn later told a group of reporters that he did not appreciate the general manager stating publicly that he was overweight last year.

”I was very disappointed,” said Penn, who has lost 30 pounds this offseason.

Penn, upset that the Buccaneers have tendered him a one-year contract as a restricted free agent, said he will not attend the team’s mandatory mini-camp, which runs Monday through Wednesday.

Curiously, Penn did not respond to questions about whether he will sit out training camp unless a new deal is done. Joe believes Penn will answer the bell. With the CBA with the NFLPA expiring after this season, and a labor stoppage of some sort likely, Penn would be crazy to risk potentially two years of a short NFL shelf life not getting paid.

Seven figures is a helluva lot better than zero figures.

Joe made it out to Bucs fanfest Saturday at the CITS. Joe thought you’d might like to look as some of the photos he shot.

WDAE-AM 620 personality Justin Pawlowski with the man who taught him about football as a tyke, his dad Kevin.

WFLA-TV weather cutie Leigh Spann, right, and a colleague.

Bucs running back, return specialist Clifton "Peanut" Smith. Peanut is much smaller than Joe ever guessed.

Raheem the Dream autographs the back of a fan's blouse.

Raheem the Dream chats with a fan.

Raheem the Dream on the JumboTron.

Bucs offensive coordinator Greg Olson listens to a question from Justin Pawlowski.

Justin Pawlowski makes a point in an interview with Raheem the Dream on WDAE-AM 620.

Justin Pawlowski and Raheem the Dream share a laugh during an interview live on WDAE-AM 620.

Raheem the Dream answers a question from Justin Pawlowski during an interview live on WDAE-AM 620.

Bryan Glazer briskly walks through the crowd hoping no one detects him at Bucs fanfest last night. Joe caught him.

A-Train Man.

If a great steak is your weakness, you absolutely have to get to FlameStone Grill in Oldsmar, about two minutes from Hillsborough Avenue in Tampa.

At FlameStone, steaks are grilled over an open flame and are only Stock Yards of Chicago Angus Beef that are minimum 28-day aged, and hand cut and individually selected on premises.

You will not find a better steak!

FlameStone is a casually sophisticated American Grill that places an emphasis on cooking with nature’s most basic elements: Fire & Stone. Their passion is to serve highly flavored food with the highest quality service possible.

Starters such as Tableside Guacamole or Stone Oven Flat Breads make your first choice a tough one. FlameStone’s Tableside Guacamole is an experience unlike any guacamole you have ever tasted. Made tableside using a traditional Molcajete, FlameStone only uses Haas avocados and the freshest ingredients possible. It is truly amazing!  One of Joe’s favorites, too!

Bucs graybeard cornerback Ronde Barber, the only leftover from the Bucs Super Bowl team, sits down for an interview with Rich Eisen on the NFL Network.

Among the items discussed were how young the Bucs are, the development of Josh Freeman and the energy that Gerald McCoy has brought to the defense.

In the interview, Barber seemed to bristle just a little bit when Eisen tried to compare McCoy to former Bucs great Warren Sapp. “Nobody’s going to wear the Double-9.”

Eisen rattled off all the names of prospective Hall of Famers that played for the Bucs when Chucky guided the team to the Super Bowl win but didn’t include Barber. Joe believes Barber should at least be in the conversation.

With the rookie contract signings of defensive end Erik Lorig and linebacker Dakoda Watson yesterday came the release of Angelo Crowell.

You remember, Crowell. Maybe you don’t.

He was the big offseason defensive free agent signing last year, who the Bucs had high hopes for at strongside linebacker. But Crowell was damaged goods, never played and sucked up $2.5 million of Mark Dominik’s budget and lowered the general manager’s grade point average.

Crowell was brought back this season. And Joe was told he looked healthy during OTAs but did not stand out.

Now he’s gone.

Call Joe a sadist, but Joe sees hope in Dominik cutting Crowell.

Joe has to believe that perhaps Dominik is more willing to cut his mistakes rather than hold on too long in hopes they redeem him. In other words, maybe cutting Crowell means there’s less of a chance Michael Clayton is here on opening day.

There’s only one sports radio station that will broadcast live interviews with Bucs players and coaches from tonight’s Buccaneers FanFest at the C.I.T.S. That would be WDAE-AM 620.

The Bucs made the rounds to meet-and-greet events at local chambers of commerce today, and Bryan Glazer decided to entertain media following a gathering in Tampa, so noted St. Pete Times beat writer Stephen Holder.

Normally, the story would be Glazer breaking from the traditional family cone of silence, but it was Glazer’s words about ticket sales and the local economy that grabbed center stage.

“We’ve had increased ticket sales obviously, but it’s very rough time in the economy for all of us. Statistics have shown in the last five years, of all the NFL markets, this market has been hit by far the worst. It went from about 4 percent to 13 percent unemployment. That’s the biggest jump in any NFL city.”

Despite the increase in sales, the Glazer family continues to warn of possible blackouts.

“To give the honest answer to the fans, we have said there is a very high risk of blackouts,” he said. “I would expect that there will be some. I do.

“I think in the beginning of the season it’s very possible. I think people will come together as we hope and start to see the winning football and want to come more and more. But we are understanding of the economy and the people and our fans have to make choices and they have to make choices that are best for themselves.

Funny how Glazer says it’s a  “rough time in the economy for all of us.” Joe respects the Glazer’s tremendous accomplishments in the business world, but the populist masses don’t want to hear Glazer lump himself in with the “rough time.” (Joe gets a visual of Team Glazer lamenting their portfolio losses at Bern’s Steak House and driving home in a blacked out Escalade.)

Regarding Glazer’s comments about the “high risk of blackouts,” especially early in the season, Joe just hopes it doesn’t get too ugly.

The Bucs play four of their first six games at home. If the team is 2-4 in that stretch and those games are blacked out, Joe can’t imagine the Bucs will have anything televised locally all season long.

Per Warren Sapp's Twitter account, this is a picture of Bucs trainer Todd Toriscelli taping up Sapp's ankle for a training session today at One Buc Place.

Several weeks ago Warren Sapp said he would come to Tampa to tutor the Bucs’ young defensive tackles. And it seems like today was the day.

Via Sapp’s Twitter account, the Bucs icon posted a variety of odd pictures and notes from One Buc Palace today.

Sapp doesn’t come out and say what exactly he’s doing in Tampa, but it’s clear what the message is, and his photo of Gerald McCoy is a giveaway.

In April, Sapp told the Associated Press he wasn’t going to do on-field work with McCoy and company, it seems like he changed his mind.

Sapp Tweeted a photograph that implies that longtime Bucs trainer Todd Toriscelli was taping his ankles so he could hit the field. Joe’s a little surprised that Sapp would brave this heat and humidity after all that time away from the field.

Hopefully, some of Sapp’s Hall of Fame knowledge and skill rubbed off the youngsters.

Joe’s about to start bashing his head against the wall. Joe can never remember being so frustrated.

And no, it has nothing to do with Rachel Watson not responding to Joe’s advances.

In the past two days, Joe has been in a virtual Soviet gulag.

Joe turns on the TV, there’s the non-basketball association.

Joe turns to Twitter and he’s assaulted with an avalanche of soccer Twitterings from otherwise reasoned people.

Joe even read a Twittering from Michael Lombardi of the NFL Network last night writing, “Now for the NBA draft… ‘

NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Joe tries to listen to local radio even and he still cannot escape. This world has gone mad — MAD I tell you! It’s nearly enough for Joe to storm a radio station. WE MUST TAKE THIS COUNTRY BACK FROM THE BRINK!!!

It’s getting to the point that Joe is starting to understand the mentality of David Koresh. A stay in Kolyma could not have been as torturous!

Joe’s world has become so unhinged, he’s actually logging extra hours at work — for free! — to escape this madness and electronic pollution as Joe has Sirius radio at work where the “King of All Media” Howard Stern, NFL Radio and Rivals Radio can bring Joe back to sanity.

(For the soccer sensitive: Joe does not hate soccer. Joe LOATHES having it crammed down his throat and treated like some illiterate neanderthal for not watching it. Let the undeveloped, socialist drug-infested third world countries have their kickball. Joe is a capitalist American, therefore soccer is a virus of the left.)

Good guy Tom Jones of the St. Petersburg Times seems to be one of the few sane people these days who have kept their roots in good old fashioned, traditional American values: football, baseball and hockey.

Jones brings word from cool cat Jimmy Traina of Sports Illustrated that the Bucs need a Kardashian, as a Kardashian means championships.

Forget finding a play-making receiver or a pass-rushing defensive end. What do the Bucs need? A Kardashian! As Sports Illustrated’s Extra Mustard points out, the Kardashian girls are a good-luck charm. Kim dated Reggie Bush and Bush’s Saints went on to win the Super Bowl. Kim’s sister Khloe married the Laker’s Lamar Odom and the Lakers won the NBA title Thursday night. But, the Bucs might be out of luck. Rumor now is Kim is dating Dallas Cowboys’ wide receiver Miles Austin, making the Cowboys the favorite to now win next year’s Super Bowl.

Joe can’t quibble with this. Any eyecandy is welcome. If it helps bring the Bucs a winner, all the better.

Joe is also confident Derrick Ward would also welcome a Kardashian to Tampa Bay.

Years ago Joe used to work with a guy who routinely advised people to “never believe anything you’re ever told.”

Needless to say, that dude was a pretty unhappy person who doomed himself to a life of solititude and alcoholism.

However, that phrase always stuck with Joe, and it served Joe very well throughout his reporting career.

Last week, Mark Dominik told reporters he could fine Donald Penn for not attending next week’s minicamp, despite Penn not having a contract for 2010. It turns out, reports eye-RAH! Kaufman of the Tampa Tribune, that Dominik’s comments were pure deception and the Bucs informed the media of their intentional gaffe yesterday.

A week ago Dominik said, “Anybody who does not show up to mandatory minicamp is subject to fines, even Donald Penn if he hasn’t signed his tender.”

A team spokesman said Thursday those comments were made in an effort to persuade Penn to sign a tender worth $3.168 million.

Joe’s not sure what’s worse: lying to the media, or the true end result of having fans all over the Tampa Bay area foolishly standing around the water cooler spouting off to their co-workers about how the Bucs can fine Penn for missing minicamp.

Ultimately, dishing out BS to media is lying to the fans, and that’s not cool whether you’re 3-13 or 13-3.