"I sure hope Danny Snyder reads Gary Shelton. I'm sick of needing Jaws to translate everything that moron Stuart Scott says when he tries to talk to me."

It’s just too obvious to Joe that Chucky will be in Washington as coach of the Redskins. Joe wrote about this months ago.

Now that Chucky’s hand-picked, golfing/Ice Palace bunker buddy Bruce Almighty was hired by the Redskins as general manager, Joe thinks it is just a matter of days before Chucky takes over the Redskins.

Veteran columnist Gary Shelton of the St. Petersburg Times not only agrees with Joe, he’s all but begging Redskins owner/tyrant to pull the trigger.

“Bruce Allen is a proven winner,” Snyder said Thursday.

Oh.

You probably remember things differently, don’t you? Allen was the guy who drafted Michael Clayton and Gaines Adams and Dexter Jackson. He was the guy who signed Todd Steussie and Derrick Deese and Charlie Garner as free agents. He was the guy who told his fans that Chris Simms wasn’t hurt and David Boston wasn’t guilty and the Bucs weren’t chasing Brett Favre (This just in: Gruden has since said he went to bed thinking Favre would be a Buc the next morning.)

That was Allen, too, who treated the truth as if he was afraid of going over the cap. He was smug, and he was distant, and he disliked reporters as much as many of them disliked him.

Sure, Chucky (and Allen) made some head-scratching personnel moves. But Joe suspects if Chucky does wind up in the district, Chucky won’t try some stunt like moving LaRon Landry to linebacker.