Why Mocks Should Be Outlawed

March 3rd, 2016
A chief spreadsheeter is called out.

A chief spreadsheeter is called out.

Hey Hillary! Hey Don! Want Joe’s vote in November? Easy. Propose a constitutional amendment to abolish mock NFL drafts.

Why? Because they are abused more than cheap alcohol in this country.

This is indirectly why Joe likes Mike Mayock so much. He does one mock draft, that’s it. That’s all that one needs to do. Maybe three at the most.

Any more than that is simply trolling. And no, you don’t need mock drafts to evaluate talent. Rankings work just fine.

These mock drafts have become irresponsible, you know, like claiming America’s Quarterback, Pro Bowler Jameis Winston hasn’t spoken to a local credentialed outlet about Lovie being fired? Mock drafts have become a parlor game to some and others abuse the mock drafts, treating readers as if they have the intellectual insight of Dan Sileo.

Take this sh!t thrown on the wall by former minor league pitcher Steve Palazzolo, one of the head geeks over at PFF. This dope has the gall to type that the Bucs will draft the wide receiver from Baylor, Corey Coleman, at No. 9 overall.

And no, Joe’s not going to link to it. Readers can just Google it if they so choose. Joe’s not about to reinforce in any way this feces other than to call out those frauds.

Joe confesses the overall premise here makes sense: You’ve invested in your franchise quarterback, America’s Quarterback, Pro Bowler Jameis Winston, and his top target may be in his final year in the NFL. So, get Jameis some weapons. Makes sense, but everything else here is as flawed as a $3 bill.

Look, Joe was in Indianapolis, at Lucas Oil Stadium last week if you haven’t read. Joe spoke with tons of NFL folks including general managers, off the record, of course. Not one person at any time suggested Coleman is the best receiver in this draft class. Shoot, Joe heard a lot more talk of him being a second-round pick. No one even hinted Coleman would be selected in the top half of the first round much less a No. 9 pick, c’mon!

In fact, one general manager told Joe that the top receiver in his mind, Laquon Treadwell from Ole Miss, was “overrated” and would be the first receiver off the board, perhaps in the bottom of the first round.

Joe saw this character Palazzolo several times (he’s very tall) in Indianapolis. Wonder what he was doing there? He surely wasn’t talking to NFL types, as evidenced by this sh!t on the wall he threw out. Guess he had fun drinking with Cris Collinsworth at St. Elmo’s (while Joe was admiring and chatting with the top-shelf female staffers at the upscale Indiana eatery and watering hole — think Hooters Calendar girls in slinky, very short-skirt, cleavage-baring red cocktail dresses — Palazzolo and his crowd were holed up in a private room talking numbers. So typical).

Anyone who tries to pass feces like this off is going to get it thrown back in their face by Joe. Now that Joe has exposed their dirty little secret, and after reading this slap in the face to thinking football fans typed by a former minor league pitcher, only someone who wants to throw their money away would actually give that outfit PFF a nickel.

21 Responses to “Why Mocks Should Be Outlawed”

  1. darin Says:

    I only like mock drafts when the bucs take who I’d take in the mock. So yes I loved the mocks where the person had them taking kuechly, like me. I liked those mock drafts over the real draft. I trust licht alot more though so cmon draft let’s get started

  2. Yar Says:

    Calm down Joe, the Bucs don’t have to draft the people in the mocks.

  3. The Buc Realist Says:

    I can’t take mock sites seriously, unless they have a mock draft for 2 years ahead as well!!!!

  4. MadMax Says:

    I love mocks, but after reading both articles of yours Joe’s, I completely understand where you’re coming from. Im usually consistent with who I think we should go with and where I think other teams might be (Bonzai can back me up on this as I was calling a lot of who the teams would pick at the 2015 draft, on this site, as it was going on live, especially the 1st round.)

    Its fun to me. Im working a lot recently so wont have as much time as I did last year, but Ive already scheduled vacation time for the 28th and 29th from work….thats right, priorities! LOL! Last year the draft fell on my regular days off (5 day weekend every 3 weeks).

  5. LUVMYBUCS Says:

    “Propose a constitutional amendment to abolish mock NFL drafts


    Have A Beer Joe

    As you know Joe. Those mocks are based who THEY think at particular team should go after. Just something to sooth the Jones of a rabid fanbase. When regular season ends#Hope

    You’ll be shocked, some of these guys have a nice following. A couple even get jobs working for the networks. There has even been a few – who’ve got the big call upstairs; to the personnell dept.

  6. LUVMYBUCS Says:

    *Personnel Dept.

  7. jvato24 Says:

    Mock drafts are to create conversations and get clicks and they do it very well, they are just running websites as you do and producing income

  8. mdknob Says:

    “they have the intellectual insight of Dan Sileo.”
    Bwahahaha! Made me spit my coffee!

  9. DoNUTS Says:

    This article has conflict within it “I like Mike Mayock” , who is the king of mock draft. I hate mock drafts. BTW, Mike was 7 of 32 last year; he did have Jaemis…but wasnt that a bit obvious. He was in the middle of pack amongst so called experts….the best expert had 12 right for clarity.

    Expert…is a word loosely used in the NFL

  10. LUVMYBUCS Says:

    “Joe was admiring and chatting with the top-shelf female staffers at the upscale Indiana eatery and watering hole — think Hooters Calendar girls in slinky, very short-skirt, cleavage-baring red cocktail dresses”

    What numbers was she talk about Joe?

  11. LUVMYBUCS Says:


  12. martinii Says:

    The reason I don’t like mock drafts is simple. For the last 11 years I have tracked RD 1 actual picks. I have averaged 25 to 30 mockers that are most common and have a following. Bottom line is after pick 4 all bets are off. The more they try to make it statistically significant the greater fantasy they create. What is fun is to see how many players you can pick to get into the top 32, regardless of the order. Mock drafts to me is much like trying to predict how many miles (exact) you are going to put on your car from the day you drive it off the lot until the day you trade it in.

  13. turk182 Says:

    Great rant!!! I agree!!! But more importantly, I am glad that you got that out. No one knows our team like us fans do.

  14. BuccaneerBonzai Says:

    This is why I stopped with mock drafts.

    I much, much prefer a team oriented wishlist…players I hope WE take. When I did mocks, I was lucky to get 1-2 players picked by the Bucs.

    With my wishlist? I got 4 last year. I have no complaints at all. It’s more personable this way.

  15. BuccaneerBonzai Says:

    DoNUTS Says
    “BTW, Mike was 7 of 32 last year.”

    BTW…there were much more than 32 picks last year. Real men focus on 7 rounds, not 1.

  16. Espo Says:

    “his top target may be in his final year in the NFL.”

    Wow I didn’t realize Evans’ hands were that bad! 🙂

  17. Trubucfan22 Says:

    Does anyone think it is weird that Joe HATES mock drafts. Yet, he finds them irresisitable to click on.

    Joe, if you don’t like Mock drafts, that is fine. STOP READING THEM THEN. When researching info, simply do not click on “mr. Soandso’s mock draft”.

    But nope, joe seizes that opportunity to make on posts on his page, to get his own clicks. It’s a vicious circle. people claim to hate mock drafts, yet those same people can’t stop clicking on them. So they will never stop making them.

  18. godzilla13 Says:

    My 2016 mock draft –

    R1) DE/OLB Leonard “the freak” Floyd Georgia (6-6 244)
    R2) NT Andrew Billings Baylor (6-1 300)
    R3) DE Carl Nassib Penn State (6 6 270)
    R4) RB Keith Marshall Georgia (5-11 219)
    R5) FS Green, T.J. Clemson (6-2 209)

  19. Trubucfan22 Says:

    These mocker always seem to peg the bucs perfectly for who we pick. I still remember the draft with adrian clayborn. All the mocks had us picking him. I thought to myself, why would we pick a 1 armed DE, when there are better pass rushers with 2 arms. The bucs went on to draft him instead of a plethera of other DE talent still on the board. I facepalmed, but was still optimistic he would do good. And he did do some good things. But he couldnt pass rush very effectively.

  20. DB55 Says:

    Love the passion Joe(s). Love the red dresses even more.

  21. Warrenfb12 Says:

    Nah man, mocks are fun for fans. Completely irrational to suggest outlawing them lol.