The Magic Wand
August 17th, 2012
One reason some believe the in-home experience of enjoying NFL games is superior to the in-game environment is missing the long lines just to get into the stadium.
That can be brutal on Florida last-summer and early-fall days with the sun beating on fans while they stand on blistering concrete with no shade to speak of.
Long lines are due, in part, to safety measures the NFL enacted to keep fans from harm’s way. The lines developed because fans were fondled patted down and, in some cases, frisked.
Well, no more pat-downs. Hello scanners.
Fans attending the Bucs game tonight will be wanded, much like when you forget your car keys are in your pocket when you walk through security at an airport, so reports a nameless typist at TBO.com.
“We’re optimistic that as fans get accustomed to this procedure, it will result in less time in line and smaller crowds at the gate prior to kickoff,” said Mickey Farrell, operations director at Raymond James Stadium.
Fans will need to have keys, phones and other metal items in their hands during the wand screening.
Bag searches will still take place, and prohibited items may be confiscated.
Joe hopes this lessens the wait in line for fans, which is the reason the wands were broken out. Thunderstorms are expected right around kickoff. The last thing needed is a line waiting to get into the stadium clogged by security checks when there is lightning in the air.
August 17th, 2012 at 12:14 pm
Once, when I was a kid, I accidently found my mom’s ‘magic wand’ and the whole experience still shakes me to this day.
August 17th, 2012 at 12:31 pm
hey oar, me too. i just can’t get rid of the image of your mom’s magic wand.
j/k 😉
August 17th, 2012 at 12:42 pm
Welcome to Police State Amerika, your papers please. George Orwell was right.
I thought a local citizen sued and won. Forcing the illegal pat downs to cease and desist.
August 17th, 2012 at 12:47 pm
Cant afford a doctor? Go to the airport, where you will recieve a free x-ray and breast or teste exam, and if you mention AlQaeda, you’ll get a free colonoscopy!
August 17th, 2012 at 12:47 pm
I think you stand on four legs, Miguel.
August 17th, 2012 at 12:49 pm
The security measures may actually account to a degree for some of the decline in attendance, but I suppose the privileged Bucs’ brass never considers that issue.
I know I wouldn’t go to games if it meant getting patted down like a criminal.
August 17th, 2012 at 12:51 pm
The pat downs were a joke anyway. If someone wanted to bring a gun in the stadium, all they had to do was stuff it in where ‘the sun doesn’t shine’. They did not pat down in that area. The wands are a much better choice.
August 17th, 2012 at 12:52 pm
ex-tsa agents need jobs too…
and yet we freely gave our rights away after 9/11 to be “protected”. and yet noone protects us from the protectors. patriot act is such a farce.
August 17th, 2012 at 1:31 pm
Off topic…DEMPS will sign with the Patriots ! announcement at 5:00pm.&%##@%*&
August 17th, 2012 at 1:35 pm
Mike J is right, me or my family would never give up our 2nd and 4th amendment rights to attend a football game especially in a tax payer funded stadium.
Hint to Homeland Security, Al-Queda would use mortars to terrorize a football stadium. They would choose the Super Bowl and not a blacked out exhibition game.
They also wouldn’t blow themselves up in an airplane, they would pull over on Hillsborough Avenue, with a semi-automatic 12 guage purchased at K-Mart and with 00 buckshot shoot airliners down as they climbed 30′ overhead loaded with passengers and fuel.
They could do both acts simultaneously and drive away into the sunset before the mortars even land.
August 17th, 2012 at 1:51 pm
Just another excuse for a pathetic fan base to not go to games.
August 17th, 2012 at 1:53 pm
raphael
I really can’t say I blame him for that choice.
August 17th, 2012 at 1:55 pm
As someone who was hired in the past to subvert security at NFL events, I can tell you that the wands will do absolutely nothing to protect anyone. They are what is called “Security Theater”, put on a show, but doesn’t actually accomplish anything.
I can stay at home and be treated guilty by my wife for free, and not have to stand in a line to do so.
And they wouldn’t need mortars or anything else. They would simply get one hired on the food crew, or break into the stadium a few days before the game and stash whatever they needed.
There are literally a thousand ways to get past security, and most of the security guys are not trained well enough to spot a real threat.
August 17th, 2012 at 2:00 pm
go ninja, go ninja, go!
August 17th, 2012 at 2:01 pm
@OAR yeah he will be on the field alot more with that short passing game
August 17th, 2012 at 2:05 pm
raphael
Unfortunately, he will have more opportunities up there. Besides, you how much Bilicheat loves our Gators!
August 17th, 2012 at 2:54 pm
It looks like they are moving towards equipment that more resembles Burger King spatulas for airport and stadium security. The people they hire are most comfortable and experienced with such equipment.
August 17th, 2012 at 3:04 pm
If the Bucs can’t stop the run again this year, that will be greater torture and destruction that any terrorist group could inflict.
August 17th, 2012 at 4:00 pm
Miguel, you are really out of touch with reality. I believe in limited govt. too, but there are necessary evils in this world, and if you don’t want to be searched, park your fat A$$ on the couch and be miserable, bitch and complain as usual.
Personally I can’t waited to get wanded tonight. Smokem if you got em.
August 17th, 2012 at 4:26 pm
bma said: “Personally I can’t waited(sic) to get wanded tonight.”
and i thought it was just oar having a repressed flashback.
😉