Bucs Drive Viewers To Drink

November 14th, 2018

“Pitcher of Bud Light, please.”

Well, here is the bright side to the Bucs being 3-6 and fans trying to pass time on the next seven Sundays to await what Santa brings in January: It’s good for Hooters.

Andrew Potter of FootballOutsiders, which sort of does a live blog during Sunday games, detailed how alcohol is a prerequisite to watching the Bucs play on offense.

Buccaneers gonna Buccaneer. A Ryan Fitzpatrick red zone interception (drink), a Fitzpatrick illegal forward pass when he was attempting to lateral on third down (drink), and a Chandler Catanzaro missed field goal from 30 yards (alcohol poisoning).

That is all that there is left in this season. In a perverse way, Bucs fans might be watching a lot of players play their final games in those garish alarm clock uniforms — for a team that befits those uniforms.

Oh, it is also a team that would do worse with Jameis.

Yeah, right (chug vodka)!

The bright side? Business will be booming at Hooters on each Sunday the rest of the calendar year.

19 Responses to “Bucs Drive Viewers To Drink”

  1. Lamarcus Says:

    I think there is a song by Kendrick Lamar in your same tune

    Interception Drank!!

    Fumble Drank!!….

  2. DB55 Says:

    Lmao Perfect!

  3. Trench War Says:

    Red Solo Cup

  4. Ray Rice Says:

    Just blame the Messiah… everyone else does. At least Geraldine McBooty is going to the coveted Pro Bowl and getting on the top 100 list. Well, at least that’s what this dumb MF argued on this here site a while ago. Haven’t heard of him since. Cheers YUC fans. Only 8 more games of this BS and then we get to see what other retread they bring in.

  5. Rod Munch Says:

    Take a swig every time they show Dirk on TV and he has a stupid quizzical look on his face – you’ll be drunk by halfway through the 1st quarter.

  6. Rod Munch Says:

    OK the last one I posted was too much, you’d be dead from alcohol poisoning by halftime, unless you’re a Winston hater, then please by all means go all in on my prior post.

    But to keep it fun and to keep you (probably) alive for the game, take a shot everytime Dirk runs it up the middle on 1st and 10 and the RB gets exactly 1.8 yards.

  7. Defense Rules Says:

    I’m lost again Joe. Don’t understand where you’re coming from when you wrote “Oh, it is also a team that would do worse with Jameis.” Sarcasm? Or was that the OTHER JOE sharing his sentiments on this conundrum?

  8. WalkdaPlank Says:

    “garish alarm clock uniforms”

    5th season in these atrocities and the majority of the fan base STILL hates these ugly uniforms.

    Ugly uniforms for an ugly franchise. Or maybe they thought the alarm clock design would wake the team up? Been sleeping since 2003.

  9. Pete I Says:

    Take a drink everytime Rod Muncher comes up for air from servicing Jameis, you will be drunk before you finish typing.

  10. MadMax Says:

    Looking for a good vid of ACDC’s “Have a drink on me” and ran across one full of hotties…hope you dont mind me sharing, Joes 😀


  11. Clodhopper Says:

    The Bucs drove this viewer to not view. I didn’t get the Sunday package for the first time in over a decade and couldn’t be happier with the decision. We’ve all seen this movie a hundred times and we know how it ends. NFL Network shows enough highlights during the games to keep me content.

  12. Buccaneer Bonzai Says:

    To be honest, I punched a door in my house I was so mad on Sunday. I have not punched anything in years. I don’t tend to lose my temper.

    But I did Sunday.

    Here’s the thing…I get that we are losing. The defense totally cost us this season…again. It;s not the players…well, except the rookies, and that’s to be expected. They need time.

    No, it’s the scheme and the defensive coaching.

    Let’s be honest with each other…if the defense was at least top 15, would anyone here want Koetter and Licht fired? Outside of the haters who want everyone fired all the time?

    Probably not. That means everyone of the coaches is doing their jobs except the defensive coaches.

    Now, some might blame Koetter…and so far as his blind loyalty to his coaches, he does share the blame. Some might blame Licht…except that the truth is, that defense has all the talent it needs to be at least middle of the pact, which would be fine for this year, considering the number of injuries and the number of rookies being forced to play important roles. As I said, they needed time.

    And we can’t blame Licht for not firing the defensive staff. For all we know, he wanted to but was not permitted (which is why I think he stays with the Bucs). Owners tend to give the Head Coach all he wants, and as I mentioned, Dirks blind loyalty to his staff is a problem.

    Even so, I think even Dirk has a chance to remain…the Glazers need to just force him to be hands off the defensive staff and turnover the whole group. Because the offense has been good enough, and that’s his thing.

    The only changes I think should be made on offense is the RBs coach and maybe the Offensive Line coach.

    But the entire defensive staff needs to be replaced, and that means the new DC will need the power to run the defense the way he wants and choose his own staff.

  13. Buccaneer Bonzai Says:

    Koetter’s act of giving up on Winston is what will likely cost him his job though. I understood pulling him from the one game. I understood sitting him the following game. Send Jameis a message. But after that, Winston should have been put back in.

    And that is the big difference between Andy Read and Dirk Koetter. Any wanted to bench Favre many times, but convinced himself not to. Favre made mistake after mistake, threw pick after pick, and Andy was extremely frustrated with him (in Andy’s words), but his staff talked him down each time and he stuck with Favre. Favre worked through his issues and became a Super Bowl QB.

    Koetter needs to put Winston back in.

  14. sunshine Says:

    Can the bucs trade Winston for another player now or do they have to wait?

  15. Bucsfanman Says:

    Joe- Don’t you mean, “Bucs Drive Viewers To Drink”….MORE!

  16. Pickgrin Says:

    I agree with most everything you said Bonzai – but only on the condition you posted it last week….

    Defense played well enough to win vs the Skins if the offense had done anything in the red zone. This group under Duffner’s guidance is more likely than not to continue improving the last half of the season IMO. They may not make it to average over the next 7 games – but they are unlikely to break NFL records for “the worst ever” as they were very much on pace for in a # of categories under Smitty’.

    Dirk didn’t lose my “support” on Sunday – although 3 points off 500 yards IS laughably and historically inept – and Red Zone efficiency has been a BIG problem ever since Koetter became the HC…

    He lost me on Monday when he said that Fitz is starting again next week.

    Wait – WHAT???

    That’s IT! Support done. Coach K needs to go. That reeks of a self serving decision!!! This guy is running scared and short of reeling off 5 or 6 wins in a row – is a dead man walking.

    And he thinks Fitz gives him the best “chance” to pull something like that off instead of Winston???

    Puh- LEASE

    Better chance of winning Power Ball with one ticket than seeing Ryan Fitzpatrick lead this yards-prolific offense to 7 straight wins and a playoff birth.

    Jason Licht is not going anywhere – and neither is Jameis Winston.

    This Bucs team has talent. Young talent. Lots of it.

    This team is WAY too talented to be sitting at 3-6 currently.

    Time to find the leader of men who can gather a great group of coaches together to coach up all this young talent.

  17. Mike Johnson Says:

    Its the only way I watch my Bucs. I eat a lirttle something and line up 8 shot glasses. 2 shots a qtr + one tall Boy (beer) Depends..sometime its tequilla, sometimes its Scotch or Brother JD. I’m so numb come the 4th qtr, I’m actually laughing. If we are losing? I throw in an extra shot..for added numbness.
    I can’t blame my Sunday drinking all on the Bucs. But they are certainly a contributing factor.

  18. Bucsfanman Says:

    Bottoms up MJ!

  19. tposse Says:

    His fingers are not on laces. Probably read blitz.