“The Abyss”

June 22nd, 2018

Like the old days.

Humorist Martin Fennelly of the Tampa Bay Times will have Bucs fans know they are living through “the abyss” again.

Joe will hunch that 80 percent of Bucs fans already know this.

When Tampa Bay lost its first 26 games in existence, it was a collection of bumbling errors and hiccups. Fennelly believes the Bucs are back to the future.

Bucs fans, you’re living through another nightmare era. Your children have no idea this team was ever any good. You are in the abyss again.

Winston’s suspension could pass for punctuation. He might never again throw a meaningful pass for the Bucs. He is edging toward the Island of Misfit Toys. Josh Freeman is saving him a seat.

Winston is not a victim. The Bucs are not victims. This is Winston’s creation, one the Bucs knew was a (remote?) possibility when they picked him No. 1 in the 2015 NFL draft and made him the face of this franchise.

Bucs fans are fully, painfully aware of this. They know the Bucs have turned into Cleveland South since that dark January 2009 Friday Chucky was jettisoned.

They know the Bucs have turned the pirate ship into the Den of Depression with the worst NFC home record since Chucky was launched.

They know the Bucs have the longest playoff drought in the NFC.

They know the Bucs have had only two winning seasons since 2008.

Bucs fans have seen the two-bit, 2 a.m., off-strip comedy show at a Las Vegas liquor store that the Bucs have turned into. Idiotic player moves that a drunk in a bar knew better than to make. Hiring fools for coaches. Player meltdowns. Disease-ridden locker room. You name it.

A franchise quarterback getting suspended over a hassle with an Uber driver? Par for the course with this team.

It’s a Bucs Life, baby.

45 Responses to ““The Abyss””

  1. Dewey Selmon Says:

    I lived through the abyss part 1. Jimmy Kimmel isn’t calling us out, we haven’t gone 0-16(yet). And we don’t have ugly creamsickles (close). When i stop to think about it, we are close. Still ain’t jumping ship. GO BUCS!!!

  2. Lord Cornelius Says:

    Yeah dark days indeed. F*ck me.

  3. PaulWartenberg Says:

    I officially blame the alarm clock number font on the jerseys. get rid of them and we will go 13-3 and ride into Valhalla shiny and chrome.

  4. danr Says:

    Stick Carriers- A new term for women in the Tampa area, who think they might run into Jameis.

    Ok. there IS a joke there. I just cant seem to be able to put the pieces together. Something about keeping him away with a stick…

  5. Chris in WA Says:

    I said it last night and I’ll say it again.

    This whole debacle should just further the point that Lovie Smith was the worst thing to ever happen to this franchise. If he doesn’t completely crap the season in 2014 who knows who we could have gotten at QB these past three years whether it was in Free Agency or the Draft. And I don’t care what anyone says: The Bucs tanked that last game in 2014 and Ray Charles could have seen it.

    Of the teams that have rebuilt around a new QB whether in Free Agency or the Draft in 2015, 2016, 2017, and 2018 why does it feel like the Bucs have the most uncertainity around their QB and their future? Did anyone wake up positive about the future of the franchise today? Even the BROWNS of all teams have hope that Baker Mayfield can turn things around.

    2014 was the worst year to completely crap the bed.

  6. Walter Seidel Says:

    Ouch………..and all absolutely true.

  7. Greg Says:

    Absolutely correct!. The only thing people need to be careful with is calling a sexual assault accusation a hassle. It trivializes a serious issue. At least until we KNOW that’s not what he was suspended for and it was merely the failure of reporting it. I however doubt that just failure to report an incident would merit a multiple game suspension so do the math. We are stuck with second rate GMs and coaches because we have second rate owners who dont know how to hire.

  8. Jolly Bucs Fan Says:

    This is less like the 0-26 which was just 2 years of terror before the team became a contender.

    This is more like the 80s-mid 90s. So many years of laughable futility and idiocy.

  9. Trench War Says:

    This team is the definition of “The Abyss”. Good luck trying to lure quality free agents now. This is just an example of the many reasons why great free agent talent avoid Tampa. Unless they are over paid with boatloads of cash up front or they are a veteran that has run out of other options, who the hell would want to sign here?

  10. D-Rome Says:

    Totally confident, right guys?

  11. Bucsfanman Says:

    Somebody wake me from this nightmare dubbed, “Bucs fan!”

  12. Eric Says:

    We should adopt the “doom despair and agony on me” Hee Haw song at the stadium.

    Gloom, despair, and agony on me
    Deep, dark depression, excessive misery
    If it weren’t for bad luck, I’d have no luck at all
    Gloom, despair, and agony on meeeeeeeeeeee

    Beyond sickening.

  13. Season Is Over Says:

    At least we have the Raiders to watch when the losing becomes unbearable. Just imagine Martin running wild with actual NFL plays and blocking.

  14. Dan Says:

    cut Winston today

  15. passthebuc Says:

    Craziness. The Bucs have gotten better through the draft and FA this year and last and have a decent QB at the helm. They will be good on the D side of the bale save for Mike Smiths play calling. I still see them winning nine games. They can now run, pass and play D, something that was not present last year.

  16. Dan Says:

    wake me up when they win 6 games lol

  17. TampaTown Says:

    HeeHaw? How old are you?

  18. Tabascco Says:

    Go get Kapernick, at least he would sell some jerseys, what could it hurt ????

  19. Fire the glazers Says:

    that’s a start.

  20. jmarkbuc Says:


    Define decent

  21. Jeffrey Yoemans Says:

    This was my fear in drafting JW. Off field issues.

  22. Walter Seidel Says:

    Yoemans, this was EVERYBODY’S fear. Just sad that many fans put their blinders on and defended this jerk. Some unbelievably still do.

  23. Anonymous Says:

    I was all in for drafting Mariota over JW. Was even cool with bring the Chip Kelly type offense. Between JW’s turnovers and off field questions I just didn’t see drafting him. I’m an ironworker not a football coach so when the Buccaneers drafted him I hoped for the best figured they knew better than I did.

  24. D-Rome Says:

    We should adopt the “doom despair and agony on me” Hee Haw song at the stadium.

    Hee Haw? Wow, you must be a lot older than me. I vaguely remember Hee Haw in the late 70’s/early 80’s as re-runs when I was very young.

  25. bradinator Says:

    This stinks! It is way harder to find a brown paper sack big enough to fit over my head that I can cut holes in these days. Guess I have to answer “paper” next time at the grocery store *sigh*

  26. Mike Johnson Says:

    Next man up Baby. We are like the presidents wife jacket, We don’t care. Get her done. If these Bucs don’t finish at least 8-8? We..determine the coaches fate. Which means..they are bait..for Nat Geo Wilds..Shark Week. NEXT!!!!

  27. Eric Says:

    Old as dirt!

  28. Eric Says:

    But still bench 225 at ten reps…..

  29. 813bucboi Says:

    adversity breeds character!!!!!!….its on you dirk!!!!!!


  30. Warren Says:

    It’s a stretch to say he may never throw a meaningful pass again. A bit dramatic there.

  31. Doctor Stroud Says:

    Martin. Fennelly. Another column with sentences longer than three words. This must be a record. But labeling him a “humorist” is…well…humorous.

  32. GhostofSchiano Says:

    Is it possible to trade Winston to the Canadian football team that currently has Manziel?

  33. GhostofSchiano Says:

    Eric and Tampa town –

    Gloom, despair, and agony on me
    Deep, dark depression, excessive misery
    If it weren’t for bad luck, I’d have no luck at all
    Gloom, despair, and agony on me

    We figured she was rich, loaded to the hilt
    And we figured she had class like the Vanderbilts
    ‘Cause we had heard for years how she was so well reared
    How was we to know they meant the way she was built

    Gloom, despair, and agony on me
    Deep, dark depression, excessive misery
    If it weren’t for bad luck, I’d have no luck at all
    Gloom, despair, and agony on me

    Just replace the “She” with WInston

  34. richbucsfan Says:

    The shine is off of JW. His exuberant fans are no longer. He brought this on himself. He may be a has been after this season if not during.

  35. Dan Says:

    Trade now for Nick Foles,

  36. Seminole Bill Says:

    I coughed up $80+ bucks last year for a “color rush” jersey with Winston #3 on the front and back, thinking this might be the ‘go-to’ Sunday jersey for the next 10 years. Now it is in the back of my closet next to 22-Martin and 5-Freeman. Any chance of the Glazers buying them back? You think?

  37. FloridaGirl Says:

    Told you we should have drafted Mariota…but he was too much of a choir boy to be the face of the franchise. Bet you Licht wishes he had drafted a QB who could get into the playoffs and can be responsible enough to roam this world without groping women.

  38. First Down Tampa Bay Says:

    Seminole Bill

    Oh poor choice to buy the Color rush jersey. Regular home jerseys look MUCH better.

  39. Alanbucsfan Says:

    Just politics…
    NFL had a choice-
    Me Too movement , Feminist protests with liberal media jumping up and down
    Take the fall, Jameis-

  40. Capt.Tim Says:

    Eric- I’m that old, and you’re right- perfect song for this excuse for a football fanchise.
    If you are a Musician- you know about Hee Haw. Many mordern day Virtuosos list Roy Clark as a major influence. Slash,Buckethead, John 5, etc all credit him as an influence to their careers.

    Jolly Bucs- the 80s and 90s were the absolutely the pit of misery. Absolutely the longest run of pathetic excuses for teams in sports history!! It was a horror show.

    And its like we’ve gone back in time, at the Horror show is back!

    If they have proved Jameis guilty- the Cut bait, and let Jameis go.
    Fitz had a winning record last year.
    Roll with him, until we can draft/trade for a new QB.

    Its not like we’d be breaking up a winning team, anyway.

  41. Capt.Tim Says:

    I cant believe that Jameis is becoming our Johnny Manziel

  42. Buccfan37 Says:

    Send Winston to a mind reader class. That way he’ll know who to grope or who not to grope. I still think the Bucs should keep him. We have waited this long for a winner, wait a little longer. I don’t see this as a major crime if true. People are just too damn sensitive.

  43. Jameis Dahmer Says:

    We’re right back in the medieval ages!! The black plague has struck the Buccaneers. Yo-Ho Yo-Ho It’s a pirate’s life for me!

  44. Proudbucsfan Says:

    Hey Joe! You think it’s to late to pick Johnny football of the CFL and reunite him with Mike Evens?

  45. Pittbucfan Says:

    FM (B)L