Media Day And Unethical Hookers

January 27th, 2014

Yes, Joe’s been in frigid New Jersey today hanging out with NFL movers and shakers and preparing for Super Bowl Media Day in Newark tomorrow.

Joe likes to attend Media Day and Super Bowl happenings. In addition to lots of beautiful TV babes everywhere and unique access to players, Joe can gather all kinds of information from various media and NFL types on Bucs topics and personalities. It’s a great education.

Every Super Bowl city is different, and today Joe learned North Jersey will stand out for its unique, um, hospitality.

Joe sought an early breakfast at Heritage Diner in the business/court district of Hackensack, four or five miles from the site of the Super Bowl, a neighborhood that sort of makes Pinellas Park look like Palm Beach — though you couldn’t find a decent apartment around these parts of burned out Jersey for less than $1,200 a month.

Anyway, the diner is truly a throwback, a place where the waitress pours your coffee while she greets you because, well, who doesn’t drink coffee. Joe got excellent service from his waitress, who without being asked or prompted advised Joe she was Italian. And after a while, like any classic Jersey diner waitress (or Flo from Mel’s diner), she jumped into Joe’s conversation and redirected it.

The waitress checked in at about 5-6, 220 pounds, and had a strong, friendly personality. So Joe was paying attention.

She started talking about price gouging related to the Super Bowl and wondered aloud whether there would be inflated rates at a crack- and hooker-infested motel nearby. That’s the place where she meets her real boyfriend for “three-hour dates” because it wouldn’t be Christian of her to have sex at home because she has a son.

“You understand?” she asked Joe.

“Of course,” Joe said. “You don’t want that action around with a kid at home.”

“No, he’s grown up and out of the house,” she replied.

“Ok,” said Joe, thinking this is going to get good.

Well, the waitress went on to speculate that the nearby crack/hooker motels on the “sin strip” would probably bump their rates to about $400 a night during Super Bowl week. Joe, familiar with the skank joints in the area from his high school days, strongly disagreed.

After a little friendly debate, the waitress then rolled into how patrons will really have to be careful at those nasty hotels. She relayed a story about how during her last date there an apparent hooker with no shoes knocked on her room door seeking help. The woman asked the waitress and her boyfriend to help her get her shoes back from her last client’s room because he wouldn’t return them.

Feeling sorry for the apparent victim and wanting to be righteous, the boyfriend “knocked on the John’s door” pretending to motel staff and asked for the shoes to be returned. The John wouldn’t cooperate and claimed the alleged prostitute took his payment for services she never provided.

The waitress and the boyfriend then interrogated the alleged prostitute about this detail, and she proceeded to confess to just taking the money and never planning to provide sex.

As Joe’s food got cold, the waitress closed the story by sharing her disbelief of the violation of prostitute-client ethics and her worry that Super Bowl visitors might be ripped off the same way and the area would get a bad name.

Only in Jersey.

Joe left a good tip and headed to Manhattan to pick up his media credentials.

Joe will have plenty of Bucs-related football chatter tomorrow.

28 Responses to “Media Day And Unethical Hookers”

  1. Tampabaybucsfan Says:

    Hopefully you won’t be “Shoeless…Joe”

  2. SAMCRO Says:

    Wow, what a bizarre conversation started by an utterly complete stranger, and a waitress of all things. lol …and to think that she was the one to initiate the topic. If Joe had pressed the issue maybe he would have found that she doubles as a waitress by day and a lady of the night. *wink *wink

  3. Jerry Says:

    Resist temptation, Joe. Rachel would not be happy.

  4. PRBucFan Says:


  5. andrew manley Says:

    Lmao…wow ..joe this is something i would not share buddy…are you drunk?

  6. Fear The Glow Says:

    So did Rex give the lady her shoes back or not?

  7. That Guy Says:

    Sounds like the Joes are right in their element.

  8. Luther Says:

    Great Story…Been in that area plenty times. Jersey sucks but NYC is great to visit if only for the food alone but I wouldn’t want to live there.

  9. Andrew 1 Says:

    lmao what the hell did I just read?

  10. FLBoyInDallas Says:

    It takes a special place to make Pinellas Park look like Palm Beach.

  11. PRBucFan Says:

    A1 exactly lol

  12. Mitch Says:

    I’m from dirty jerz! That story sounds 100% plausible. From the diner , to the italian heritage, attitude, and willful oversharing of personal info. Only thing joe didn’t mention is if she says Gravy or red sauce!

  13. LoggedontoSay Says:

    Hope Joe had a good time!

  14. Cmurda Says:

    Thanks Joe. After reading that, I can’t fall asleep. That was just odd and my brain refuses to comprehend it. Can you talk about Hardy saying he would love to play with G McCoy again?

  15. k1ngadroc Says:

    Hilarious Joe!! Love it!

  16. Amar Says:


    Maybe you could try to get an interview with Michael Bennett, thoughts about making a return and other Bucs related goodies. I’m sure he’ll give a Seahawks type political answer but it would still be nice….

    Joe expects to do that. –Joe

  17. Patrick in VA Says:

    That story was a welcome break. Thanks for sharing fellas

  18. Yar Says:

    You’re from Jersey? That explains a lot.

  19. Says:

    Having worked as a cook in diners this story was extra awesome! Looking fwd to hearing all the good Bucs stuff Joe.

  20. GoNOLES Says:

    Cant have a gun but all the hookers and diseases you can handle! Woooh! Jersey makes Pinellas Park look high class. This was better than hearing about Joe’s deep seated love for Texas A&M QB Manchild again.

  21. BuccaneerBonzai Says:

    Joe, did you add “because it wouldn’t be Christian of her…” or did she?

    Because I think she completely missed that boat.

    Her words.–Joe

  22. Clowney Says:

    Hide that Rolex Joe.

  23. Bobby Says:

    @ Andrew 1 “lmao what the hell did I just read?”

    LOL! That sums up my feelings exactly!! 🙂

  24. ShutTheBucUp Says:

    dont forget to double wrap!

  25. Left_Coast_Bucs_Fan Says:

    It hasn’t changed, thanks for reminding me why I got the hell out of NJ 40 years ago Joe!

  26. BuccaneerBonzai Says:

    BTW, Joe…pretty good storytelling skills with the dialog.

  27. BucfaninMO Says:

    Hmmm.. 5-6 220. Can she run block? Might save us a draft pick..

  28. Orlampa Turd in Nicaragua Says:

    Yet another reason why Joe is the only place to go for Bucs news and other assorted, miscellaneous goodies!