Wiretappers, Feds Reach Deal

December 4th, 2013

j. edgar hoover

Getting squeezed by the feds may not be so fun after all.

The two baffoons who decided to wire tap the phone of Bucs rock star general manager Mark Dominik, then thought they could get wise and make a couple of shekels off of their misdoings by selling a recording to the notorious Deadspin.com, quickly found out the error of their ways when the long arm of the federal government went after them.

Apparently scared out of puberty by the thought of prison time in Guantanamo or coughing up hundreds of thousands of dollars in fines and being on every federal watch list in the free world, the bozos copped a deal, so reports the creator, curator and overall guru of ProFootballTalk.com, the great Mike Florio, by way of the Associated Press.

The charges of intentionally intercepting a wire communication could have carried up to five years in prison and a $500,000 fine.

The two 21-year-olds from Plymouth, Mass., didn’t plan what happened, Personius said, when they began angling for an NFL tryout for Barber in March.

“On the other hand … Mr. Kaiser deeply regrets the outcome,” the attorney said.

Let this be a lesson to wannabe wiretappers. The NFL has friends in very, very, very high places (why, hello President Obama,) and unless you have the guile, savvy, wherewithal and heavy-hitter contacts of Jack Bauer, you do not want to mess with Washington, D.C.

7 Responses to “Wiretappers, Feds Reach Deal”

  1. Buc1987 Says:

    “Let this be a lesson to wannabe wiretappers. The NFL has friends in very, very, very high places (why, hello President Obama)”

    Well atleast Obama has some friends left. Ouch 39% approval.

  2. Oil Derrick Brooks Says:

    Federal prosecutors have a 99% conviction rate, with 97% coming from guilty pleas. That tells me they didn’t have a case, or had some other reason for dropping the charges. Or we are not getting important details. Did they plead guilty to anything? Maybe the involved teams didn’t want more media coverage.

  3. lightningbuc Says:

    Are they going to prosecute the alleged “rock star” and the Bills former GM for stupidity?

  4. BuccaneerBonzai Says:

    Jack Bauer is making his return to the small screen in 2014. It will be a 12 episode mini-series.

    Buc1987, you number is off. Obama has a 42% approval rating. That is the exact same as Bush at the same point in his career.

    Ironically, the most resent gallap poll shows the Republican Party at 11%. That’s 31% lower than Obama.

  5. BuccaneerBonzai Says:

    Oil Derrick Brooks, I’m guessing they pled no contest, as these deals usually go. I think the prosecution recognises that these were ppractical jokers and not hardened criminals. They crosses a line and needed to be penalized, but they didn’t deserve prison time.

  6. Oil Derrick Brooks Says:


    If you look at the linked articles, it say dropped charges. Huge difference. Pleading no contest would result in a conviction.

    Something happened since the arrests to trigger this. If a federal prosecutor actually brings charges on you, they have all the goods to convict already, hence the 99% rate. Federal is a whole different ballgame than local or state.

  7. BigMacAttack Says:

    Oh, and that door you just kicked in was for your protection, not mine.