Chucky’s Vow Not To Coach Rings Hollow

December 23rd, 2009
Damn right I want to coach in the NFL next year. Im already sick of Jaws passing gas in the booth.

"Damn right I want to coach in the NFL next year. I'm already sick of Jaws passing gas in the booth."

Like most red-blooded American men, Joe was watching the preamble to Monday Night Football earlier this week when he saw Chucky claim the only team he will coach next fall will be his son’s flag football team.

Color Joe skeptical.

Mind you, this came from the same man who, among other fibs, just months ago bragged how much he didn’t watch BSPN and thought employees of the network were full of human fertilizer.

Oh, look. Chucky’s working for BSPN. How quaint.

One reason Chucky was so adamant that he’s not coaching the Redskins is that he was never offered the job (if reports are accurate). Pretty damn easy to brag you aren’t going to work for a company if you were never offered a gig.

The Dallass Cowboys job could still open up. It’s ripe for Chucky. Jerry Jones loves splash and has seemingly a bottomless checking account for players, something Chucky covets.

If Jones were to lop the head off of Lumpy next month and offer Chucky the gig, Joe would be flabbergasted if Chucky turned him down. Coaching the Cowboys is a once in a lifetime opportunity and Joe simply cannot believe Chucky’s ego wouldn’t get the best of him.

If Chucky was so set in his ways not to coach next year, how come he was talking with Buffalo last month?

7 Responses to “Chucky’s Vow Not To Coach Rings Hollow”

  1. BigMacAttack Says:

    I don’t think Chucky will go to Dallas, as once thought after last week’s victory over N’olins. Chucky is an Offensive mind and Wade Phillips is a defensive Coach. If Chucky became their head coach, who will coach the Defense? Jerry Jones, himself? Derrick Brooks could be Chucky’s DC, but I don’t think Brooks wants that right now, and I can’t see Jones having a Rookie DC. Chucky’s best fit is Washington or Cleveland.

  2. Jdub Says:

    Why would any coach wanna go to Dallas? I know it’s “Amercia’s Team” or atleast was once upon a time, and it’s a big market….but what coach in his right mind would wanna put up with Jerry Jones standing over him second guessing him and at times even over ruling his decisions? Jerry Jones is right next to Al Davis as the worst Owner to coach for.

  3. Louie Says:

    I just hope Chucky goes to an AFC team so he won’t get frequent opportunities to beat the Bucs.

  4. Joe Says:


    Why would any coach wanna go to Dallas?

    First, let Joe be clear: He loathes Dallass.

    While a coach would have to put up with Jones, he’s hardly the worst owner to work for. There are many advantages not the least of which is cash. You’d have endorsement deals up the whazoo. Additionally, with Jones, he’s not afraid to spend cash on players which is a coach’s dream.

    There are many teams that are worse places to coach than Dallass. Cleveland springs to mind.

  5. FlBoy84 Says:

    It’s simple coach-speak. Much like Brian Kelly supposedly told someone he’d entertain talking to ND. “His players, however, claimed Kelly told them he was staying put. “He said, ‘It’s not an issue; I’m not going there,'” Bearcats safety Aaron Webster said. “He said, ‘I love Cincinnati, and I’m staying here.'” At least Gruden doesn’t have any players he has to lie to now.

    But you can’t blame him if he decides to stay out another year to spend time with the family, while collecting (screwing the Glazers out of) 5 million a year plus whatever he’s pulling in from BSPN (which I’m sure is not chump change) just for doing 16 MNF games.

  6. FlBoy84 Says:

    And remember, Gruden’s only 46 and has a lot of time left in the coaching ranks. The Dallas gig will open up again in the future, so it’s not like he won’t have the opportunity to ever get there if that’s his desire.

  7. Tom Says:

    Chucky is owed 5 million by the Glazers to not coach an NFL team. I have no idea how much he’s getting to do part time work at the four-letter network but I would guess 1 to 2.5 million sounds right. Assuming this, Chucky would get 7 million next year to NOT put in 80 hours a week, play with the kids, screw his wife etc.

    Is Jerry Jones ready to give Gruden the biggest contract ever to a HC, like say, 10 million a year? Because that’s the only way I see Gru passing up his sweet gig. Wait one more year and you can get him for cheaper.