Prayers Answered

June 13th, 2009

The Bucs are not interested in animal rights activist Michael Vick. Joe can breathe a sigh of relief.

As you are reading this, Joe is out and about sweating at the CITS during Fan Fest, taking ample time to gawk at the ample attributes of the 2009 Bucs cheerleaders.

While a Bucs cheerleader — any cheerleader — following Joe home this afternoon would be the answer to his prayers (let’s be honest, Joe doesn’t have the pull with the Almighty to somehow lure Rachel Watson into his lair), Joe yesterday learned that at least one of his prayers has been heard.

Dog-loving Michael Vick will not be wearing a Bucs uniform.

Seems eye-RAH! Kaufman of the Tampa Tribune overheard Bucs general manager Mark Dominik speak at a function about the Bucs acquiring Vick, who was released by the Dixie Chicks yesterday. In so many words, Dominik said, “Hell no.”

Vick, the beleaguered quarterback who is completing a 23-month sentence for overseeing a dogfighting ring, was released by Atlanta Friday.

“We weigh every option when it comes to players,” said Bucs GM Mark Dominik, “and I can honestly say we’ve done our due diligence on Michael Vick and we’re not interested.”

The way Raheem the Dream has collected quarterbacks in the offseason would make Chucky blush. Joe is beyond gratified that Raheem the Dream isn’t gushing over Vick like a high school girl would over Justin Timberlake.

Raheem the Dream has a habit of that with certain quarterbacks.

3 Responses to “Prayers Answered”

  1. paul Says:

    Sad to say but I did not see Rachel’s name on the 2009 roster, OH NOOOOOOOO.

  2. thedeej3000 Says:

    Why do you call it the CITS? WHat is the CITS

  3. Joe Says:

    CITS = Community Investment Tax Stadium, an ode to the late, great Chris Thomas.

    As Joe has stated many times before, Joe will be happy to call the CITS the name that the local financial institution pays the Glazers Boys to have its name affixed to the stadium. So long as said financial institution pays Joe is some way. Like the Glazer Boys, Joe’s a capitalist too. A low-interest refinance on Joe’s mortgage would be fine, but Joe is open-minded to other suggestions.

    If any representatives of said financial institution are reading, please email Joe at and we’ll talk turkey. In turn, Joe can do some favors for said financial institution.

    Joe can promise his rates are far better than TBO, or even the internet publication popular with Rachel Watson and a former roommate of Mark Dominik.