Forget (Future) Jailbird Plexiglass Burress!

May 29th, 2009

This infatuation the Bucs have with the noted NRA spokesman and soon-to-be jailbird Plaxico Burress borders on insanity. And it makes Joe wonder if Raheem the Dream may want to stay away from adult beverages.

Woody Cummings of the Tampa Tribune noted Thursday that Raheem the Dream still dreams of Plexiglass and his wonderful rap sheet.

Though he didn’t get into specifics, Bucs coach Raheem Morris sounded Thursday like a coach who would jump at the chance to add Burress to his roster if Burress can clear himself from his legal issues.

“He’s a great player,’’ Morris said of the former Giants and Steelers standout. “Anytime you have an opportunity to get a great player you’d love to see a great player come to Tampa.’’

Before Joe gets into the nuts and bolts of this overgrown child, just ask yourself why the Giants, fresh off a Super Bowl win largely because of Plexiglass, washed their hands of him? In addition, why did a team like the Steelers, who annually knocked on the door of the Super Bowl with Plexiglass washed their hands of him (and subsequently won two Super Bowls without him)?

Why? Because Plexiglass has the mentality of a standard nine-year old punk.

Just those small facts alone are enough to run away from the guy.

But the main reason the Bucs need to quit toying with this Plexiglass nonsense is that no one knows when he will next be able to play. It’s likely not this year. It’s possible not even in 2010, shoot Plexiglass may not be eligible to play until 2012.

Aside from his jail term, there’s the looming suspension by NFL warden Roger Goodell.

No one knows for sure when Plexiglass can next play. So why covet a monster head case who may be out of football for (at least) two years who will be likely past his prime?

Then take into account:

Giants play-by-play man and co-host of Sirius NFL Radio’s “The Opening Drive” Bob Papa spilled the beans on Plexiglass Thursday morning. So immature and stubborn is Plexiglass, who is so dumb he can’t use a pistol holster and instead hangs in a crowded nightclub with a loaded rod in his pocket, turned down a three-month jail sentence to put his current legal issues behind him.

Rather than spend as little as two months in a cage, Plexiglass might be looking at a year in the plush New York penthouse known as Riker’s as he plays the part of an NFL cheerleader to some guy named Bubba.

Papa dished the dirt, documented by creator, curator and overall guru Mike Florio.

“This is what I’ve been told and what I’ve heard,” Papa said on the air. “They worked out something where they had it down to about a three-month jail term with actually only two months served and about 1,500 hours of community service. And I think his lawyers felt that they had a pretty good deal. He doesn’t want to go to jail at all. He shot down the deal. . . . He does not want to go to jail at all. So now coming up in another couple of weeks we’re gonna find out what’s gonna happen. But my guess is that the city of New York is not gonna back off any kind of jail time.

“Evidently, he’s gonna have to go to Riker’s Island,” Papa added. “He’s deathly afraid of going. . . . [I]f he would have just taken the deal when it originally was offered it would all be over with by now. But supposedly the community service hours and the jail time are not appealing to him. He does not understand that he is not in any kind of position of leverage. He has no leverage. He — not his representatives — he thinks he has leverage.

“His lawyers thought he had a great deal. He shot down the deal.”

Joe heard Papa later mock Plexiglass for not listening to, or heeding the advice of his legal counsel, some of which is the best money can buy in the Big Apple.

This flirtation with Plexiglass is pure and utter nonsense by the Bucs. What’s next, Raheem the Dream will start waxing poetic about Rae Carruth?

How about concentrating and worrying about guys who you know are available?

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