Kellen Winslow’s Fun At Target

January 17th, 2014

Joe doesn’t know where to begin — or end — when it comes to this story about former Bucs tight end Kellen Winslow, aka DJ Toes On The Line.

It has all the necessary elements of intrigue and drama: a Target parking lot, Vaseline, fast-food chicken, a woman allegedly seeing his erect penis, drugs, law enforcement and NFL policy, all at 5:30 p.m.

And this was the guy in Josh Freeman’s ear for years.

27 Responses to “Kellen Winslow’s Fun At Target”

  1. Oil Derrick Brooks Says:

    Soldier of Love, amirite???????

  2. Will Says:

    One word…..Karma

  3. lightningbuc Says:

    YUCK! I like that dude needed TWO jars of vaseline to take care of his business.

  4. Tampabaybucsfan Says:

    Buccaneer Man

  5. d-money Says:

    Little Seargent Winslow was standing at attention.

  6. Snook Says:

    Surely his name changes now to DJ dick in his hand.


  7. Patrick in VA Says:

    DJ Spanxx

  8. ROBERT6 Says:

    like yall never done this before…

    but dang find a quiet spot man!

  9. stanglassman Says:

    Polishing the little soldier’s helmet.

  10. PewterPirates Says:

    I think the police report was backwards. The lady got out of her car and saw Winslow’s junk and THEN stated how cold it was outside. Sorry, I had to.

  11. Nic Says:

    “Toes curled on the line”

  12. ander Says:

    from steroids to marijuana now to jerking off outside in public

  13. The_Buc_Realist Says:

    Please Joe, Please tell me one more time how you still think that this was a good trade that the Pop-star did. He played 1 1/2 years and limped around for the rest. bad attitude, never practiced, Committed push-offs as he could never get open. we gave up a second round and a 5th round for this clown!

    Joe has written several times that the trade wasn’t all bad by any stretch. Winslow had a strong, positive hand in Freeman’s development, as we saw in 2010, Winslow’s second consecutive strong, injury-free season leading the team in receptions while Freeman was a budding star. Obviously, things deteriorated in Year 3 (not just Winslow) while Winslow again led the team in catches and stayed healthy.–Joe

  14. Oil Derrick Brooks Says:

    Never earned that highest paid ever TE contract either, Joe.

  15. biff barker Says:

    Is he still a member in good standing with Target Stores?

  16. Chef Paul Says:

    Wow. So many great jokes on this comment section. I was going to come up with one, but I cant top these. Awesome!!

  17. The_Buc_Realist Says:

    The only thing that could top this story at this point, Is if all that was going on while he was doing a wheelie on his motorcycle one handed!

  18. biff barker Says:

    Surprised to see the Soldier is as equally adept at pulling as he was pushing.

  19. knucknbuc Says:

    Vaseline was on sale 2 for 2.50 why wait? Lmao

  20. The_Buc_Realist Says:

    He should have gone to costco and got the 2 gallon jug.

  21. Captain Stagger Says:

    You got to hand it to Winslow, he handled this situation fluidly. Sure he is was a jerk in the locker room, but a real hands on guy on the field.

    Seems he strokes more than his ego….

    If it was that cold did he leave his jacket on…or jack it off?

  22. PRBucFan Says:

    Funky Monkey incense will do that to ya…


  23. tmaxcon Says:

    Schiano is probably disappointed in two jars form / fundamentals

  24. The_Buc_Realist Says:

    Kinda of makes you wonder what Winslow was doing when he couldn’t make it to camp because he was moving??? maybe we should not ask exactly what he was moving???

  25. bucrightoff Says:

    Thank effing God we traded him before this happened. This year has been bad enough already.

  26. Bangkok Buc Says:

    In his lawyer’s statement, he said he was lost and looking for a Boston Market restaurant. I guess he was in the mood for “Jerk Chicken”

  27. tmaxcon Says:

    Bangkok very nice!!!

    His father was such a class act and two jars is such a punk