The Bucs Are Corona

September 6th, 2013

Yeah, this is a silly little time-waster as we all drink beer, watch college football, if not high school football, and count the minutes until the Bucs and Jets kick off Sunday.

It seems like craft-beer loving Mike Tanier, of SportsOnEarth.com, has beer in mind as well. Tanier, a good guy Joe chatted with at the combine last winter, decided to compare each NFL team to a beer.

For the Pewter Pirates, Tanier writes the Bucs are Corona.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Corona

Most fans only pay attention to the Buccaneers when they fly down to watch them host a Northeast corridor team when the weather gets cold. (Eagles at Bucs October 14th, visit Uncle Carlo in Clearwater while you’re there! Bills at Bucs December 8th; no one will blame you if you don’t book a return flight!) The half-frozen Baltimore-to-Bostonian emerges from the plane, sees palm trees, hears the words “Gulf of Mexico,” and thinks, “say, what is that flavorless watery nonsense they always serve at silly luau parties and Cinco de Mayo night at Tipsy McStereotypes? The stuff with a edge of lime in it to give it some taste and smell? Corona! Give us a bucket of those!” When the Yankee arrives home sunburnt and hung over, his only memories are of a pirate ship, two or three interceptions, and conch fritter barf.

Joe isn’t quite sure what “conch fritter barf” is like, and to be honest, Joe really doesn’t want to find out.

Joe does know one thing: Fruit and beer do not mix. Not ever. No way, no how. Just the thought of a Bud Light Limarita makes Joe’s stomach turn. Yick!

Maybe that nasty taste of lime juice in a bad beer is what interceptions are supposed to taste like?

51 Responses to “The Bucs Are Corona”

  1. Oil Derrick Brooks Says:

    Never had a lemon shandy on a scorching hot day, Joe? You are missing out. I can suck down those Leiny’s all day.

    No other fruits, but citrus in beer is good.

    If it’s good enough for pirates, it’s good enough for me.

  2. lightningbuc Says:

    Conch fritter? Dude has Tampa confused with the Bahamas!

  3. lou@louburger.com Says:

    Ha, wonder if he got paid to spew out this nonsense. Typical northerner though. What they don’t understand is that this is our lifestyle, and grey skies and large women just aren’t our cup of tea…..Eh? I would much rather b down here with a mediocre football team than up North suffering in The tundra with overcrowded, expensive cities with decent football teams.

  4. CanadianBucsfan Says:

    The lime in the beer isn’t for flavor Joe , it’s to stop the scurvy . Scurvy medicine .

  5. Adam L. Says:

    “The Buccaneers… Miles Away From Ordinary.”

    Yeah, okay.

  6. richardtyson Says:

    If the bucs are compared to a Corona then we need to add a lime to it. Maybe that lime is a qb.

  7. RBellBuc Says:

    Most fans only pay attention to the Buccaneers when they fly down to watch them host a Northeast corridor team when the weather gets cold.

    Does anyone understand what he just said?

    He’s saying Tampa Bay has the worst fan base. The only time we sellout is when a north team comes down bringing all their fans.

    Little does Joe’s new bestie know, is that all those other team fans, are already here!

    Ha …Corona sucks .. I guess he means we do too.

  8. BigMacAttack Says:

    Key West is the Conch Republic. I used have a commercial boat on Stock Island. Conch fritters are one of may favs, but you have to cook them hot and a little longer than one might think to keep the inner fritter from having a doughy texture. Few cook them well and barfing may occur when improper cooking techniques are used

  9. BigMacAttack Says:

    Has anyone had the Ghost of Hunahpu beer at Cigar City in Tampa. Man that stuff will light you up.

  10. Drew Says:

    Look at the brighter side. Anderson Cooper just announced they’re making beer flavors similar to Girl Scout cookie flavors. On a positive note they weren’t compared to these thereby insinuating they’re a bunch if pansies.

  11. tonytwocents Says:

    @RBellBuc,

    he was writing about NFL fans in general. and how they only acknowledge us if they fly down to watch us host their teams. cause I’m sure he doesn’t think most Bucs fans live up in the NE. ……but we do have some “backwards thinking” fans. put up as many high rises and fancy freeways as you want, we’re still in the south. (cue the ‘Deliverance’ banjo boy)

  12. Buc1987 Says:

    “He’s saying Tampa Bay has the worst fan base. The only time we sellout is when a north team comes down bringing all their fans.”

    RBellBuc…is this shocking to you?

    We make fun of the Jaguars all the time for having a tiny, nonexistent fanbase, but the fact is that the Jags sell 10,000 more tickets per game than the Bucs do.

  13. BucoBruce Says:

    JOE,

    How are we looking on home game sellouts,I hope we see most games.monday and thur. games help out .BUCS 38 jets 13.

  14. MadMax Says:

    I like beer flavored beer and coffee flavored coffee….call us old fashioned Joe’s….

  15. MadMax Says:

    When I come to Tampa BigMac, you’re going to have to hook me up.

  16. Buc1987 Says:

    BucoBruce…I usually check ticketmaster daily I scroll around the map on there too. Although it’s not a reliable source. I still like to check out certain games and see what the seating is looking like. From what I can tell. The home opener might make reach 85% level needed to be on TV. Of Course a big win against the Jets will probably help out even more.

  17. RBellBuc Says:

    tonytwocents

    That could be what he meant. I guess i’m getting a little protective and I’m beginning to take everything as being negative. I must be reading more into it that what it actually says. Almost like as if I got my guard up and I’m ready to react to anything I believe is a negative slight.

    sorry Buc fans if I ever offended any of you because I might have misunderstood you.

    I want the season to be special and I truly want this to be our year.

  18. Buc1987 Says:

    BucoBruce…also I was at the Ravens preseason game and this is no lie that stadium was about 75% full and it was only a preseason game. So that looks promising for some of the games having the blackout lifted. Of course it does not matter me TV wise. Because I’m going be there live for every game. I’ll be the loudest S.O.B. in the whole stadium. So I really want the stadium filled so they can join in and make that place rock once and for all.

  19. MadMax Says:

    you’re a “Rbell”….supposed to offend 😉

  20. RBellBuc Says:

    Really I don’t Know why I was defending Tampa.

    I don’t even live there anymore. ..lol

  21. MadMax Says:

    You going to this one Buc87? I know one guy, “DCBUCSFAN” he lives up there and is going.

  22. Buc1987 Says:

    MadMax..no I live in the Tampa area. I don’t have funds to go up to the Jets game. Especially after shelling out 1300 bucks for my seats this year. I have great seats though section 150 right in the corner of the endzone about 8 rows from the field. It’s the corber where VJ caught a lot of TD’s last season. I can’t friggin’ wait. Of course I’m still going with the plan of being out on the corner of MLK waving my 3 X 5 Bucs flag for 2 hours before the game. While the wife holds up a sign that says be loud today. It’s going to be hot on that corner, but I’m bringing a 12 pack with me to keep me refreshed. The next home game after that I have to go and try to find where Buc’n Junkie is tailgating at. I got his directions but it would have been nice if I got his actual real name. So I guess just find where he parks and holler out Hey Buc’n Junkie until he answers. People will probably look at me like I’m nuts but oh well. I am nuts.

  23. MadMax Says:

    That you are, lol 😉

  24. Chef Paul Says:

    Uh oh. I think you were too specific on your location. Now one of your cut and paste victims is going to drive by and throw tomatoes at you.

  25. Buc1987 Says:

    Chef Paul …lol I have been worried about that just a bit. It’s okay I’ll be standing by the po po. Tomatoes are fine. Just no fists, and if there are fists stay away from the teeth. I’ve had expensive dental work done.

  26. chef paul Says:

    LMAO. So now you’ve given a date, time, location, and your weakness. Maybe you should put a decoy out there the first week. Or maybe have your cousin the long snapper come for back up

  27. Buc1987 Says:

    chef paul …LMAO and I will go so far as to mention the wife has pepper spray on her key chain too. I don’t think I will have any problems anyway most of these a-holes don’t go to the games anyways.

  28. BucoBruce Says:

    What do you guys think the score will be sunday,or should I say how much will the bucs win by.Thanks 1987.I ALWAYS GO TO 1 TO 3 GAMES A YEAR,i JUST HATE HAVING TO GO TO THE BLACKOUT GAMES SO I DONT MISS A GAME INSTEAD OF JUST PICKING THE GAME I WANT TO GO TOO.

  29. Buc1987 Says:

    Yikes I really don’t like predicting scores. Especially with Geno in there it’s hard to predict with an unknown QB on the other side. I will tell ya 1 thing though I did predict that the Broncos would destroy the Ravens last night. Hmm I’ll say 17-10 Bucs and that’s throwing out my homerism. If you put in my homerism I’ll say 24-13 Bucs.

  30. BucoBruce Says:

    38- 13 BUCS!!!!!!!TAMPAAAAAAAAAAAAA

  31. Buc1987 Says:

    Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

  32. Santos Says:

    Buc1987 I’m in section 150 row k seats 1 n 2, we need to get together n make noise!!!!

  33. Buc1987 Says:

    Wow Santos were you at the Ravens game?

  34. Buc1987 Says:

    I’m in row T. I was the one that held up the 25 foot banner WE BELIEVE IN JOSH. Of course you were in front of me so you prolly missed it. No for real. I want our entire section to be the loudest in the whole stadium. Yes I will go look you up man. Do you go by what Santos? Yes sir it’s my mission this season to make this stadium rock.

  35. BigMacAttack Says:

    1987,
    I don’t think you can bring pepper spray in the stadium. A little tip for you, have your wife carry a can of wasp spray in her car if she doesn’t carry. Wasp spray will reach over 10 feet and when you spray an attacker in the face with it you will totally incapacitate him. It takes at least 15 minutes to recover. I can eat pepper spray all day long. Most wasp sprays have nice powerful stream.

  36. Buc1987 Says:

    BigMacAttack…lol I really don’t think I’ll have problem though man. I don’t think I pissed off too many people. Even if I did who the hell is going to look me up just for something I said on a website, all in the name of being a fan? Usually the people checking tickets won’t even let people down there without a ticket as prrof anyways. It’s outside of RJS for the 2 hrs waving the flag that I might run into some trouble. Even then I give it a 2% chance that anything will ever happen. Now Saints fans on the other hand, I can’t guarantee anything. My mouth might get me punched in the face. The home opener is the only time I will be out there waving the flag anyways.

  37. Tampabaybucfan Says:

    87

    Your Red Sox are busting my Yanks again….

    Can you do a cold Corona without a smoke?

    Like I say…quit the cigs…promise yourself a nice cigar in a few months….say goodbye to the cigs.

  38. Buc1987 Says:

    LOL I saw that Tampabaybucfan…I saw that they were down by a mile in the 7th then I clicked back to check it out. Then bam wow blam. I think the Sox are on mission man. I said about a month ago whoever takes the East is going to the World Series.
    Yeah I’ll be fine it’s been what about 6 weeks without a cig. I might try that cigar thing out though if the Buc beat the Saints. Poor Saints fans are going to hate my living guts if the Bucs beat them. I’m going to be merciless coming out of that stadium.

  39. Buccanr1 Says:

    Yes, conch fritters suck at any restaurant in Florida!
    I’m in west palm and my family has a house on west end Bahamas. I catch my own conch and make my own conch fritters. None of that bullshit hush puppy crap that’s frozen at a restaurant.
    Conch illegal in the states.

  40. Santos Says:

    1987, yeah I was there, left when weber threw the first pic, I go by Juan or Santos, big guy bout 6’8″ 350

  41. PRBucFan Says:

    Don’t know bout y’all but corona is my peoples favorite past time lol

    I’ll take it jajaja

  42. LUVMYBUCS Says:

    Cue the “No fruit in Beer or Team”..euphemism..smh..lol

    No Fruit In Beer (Classic)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAXk8h1iHAw

  43. LUVMYBUCS Says:

    Que

  44. Reggie Robys Watch Says:

    Do we really suck as bad as Corona? Uggh!!

  45. Capt. Tim Says:

    I usually like my beer to be beer flavored, and my coffee to be coffee flavored
    But Lime in a Corona gets me in a Tropically kinda mood. Works on the Boat- works on the Bay, ain’t bad as a Buc beer!

    Gimme me a tropical breeze, cool waters, warm sands,Bikinis,and winning Buc team any day! They can shove anything past the Tennessee line. Is a pirates life for me, my brothers!!

    Now if we can just get enough co-hesion between our free lancing, make plays on the Run, laid back QB- and our Detail oriented, feet on the line coach- to win 9 games or more!! Life would be perfect!!
    Bring on the Conch fritters!!!

    And I would definately try an Expresso beer! Coffee in Alcohol let you drink longer!!

  46. MTM Says:

    If the Bucs are Corona. That must make the Jets -Zema. Go Bucs. And yes Corona’s are great with lime!

  47. Bucnjim Says:

    Zima now that’s funny! I wonder if they still make that crap?

  48. BigMacAttack Says:

    Captain Tim is Back!
    Chart me a course to the North End Zone!
    Arghhhhh

  49. BirdDoggers Says:

    What the Northerners fail to realize is a heavy bodied beer doesn’t quite fit the Florida climate. A lighter bodied beer is far more refreshing on the hot, sunny, humid days.

  50. Buc1987 Says:

    BirdDoggers…you are correct. Heineken is my favorite beer. Although I can never seem to drink it in the summer here in Florida.

  51. PRBucFan Says:

    Us Caribbean folk enjoy our Corona and Heineken,

    Hate all day makes no difference to us ahahaha