“Muscle Hamster” And The Power Of Latin

December 13th, 2012

Yeah, believe it or not, Joe went to a Catholic grade school growing up, and that’s where his (nightmarish) experiences with sadistic priests and old nuns getting their sexual tensions released with pointers, fists, et al, came to an end.

Fortunately for Joe, he avoided having to learn Latin, since this was the post-Vatican II era. But Joe’s old man was not as fortunate. He had to take Latin through his college days. The language to Joe’s old man was far more an irritant than Sabby the Goat was for Joe.

Joe brings this up because Joe may have stumbled upon the true meaning of Doug Martin’s moniker, “The Muscle Hamster.” It could mean punishing, or running over defenders.

That’s the hint Joe got from Saints interim head coach Joe Vitt yesterday during a conference call with the Tampa Bay pen and mic club. Vitt was extolling the virtues of Martin when he dropped this gem:

“I told our football team this morning, ‘I haven’t seen a back run over as many people as this back. I mean, he is dropping linebackers and defensive linemen like third period Latin’,” Vitt said.

So Joe believes, based on this information, it would be fair to say that Martin’s mission statement is EGO mos run vos super.

(This means “I will run you over.”)

12 Responses to ““Muscle Hamster” And The Power Of Latin”

  1. Ian's Gay Lisp & Ron's Drinking Problem Says:

    Saints are dead last in rushing defense…do we save Martin’s health with 15 carries or less or run him full-time for the last 3 games (i say give him a light load)?

  2. McBuc Says:

    I say run him, let’s win the last three for prides sake.

  3. OAR Says:

    Now you wouldn’t believe me if I told you, but I could run like the wind blows. From that day on, if I was going somewhere, I was running!

  4. holymoly Says:

    Ok Forrest , lol . I think you run the Hamster and try to win the next three . Plus i’m sick of losing to division rivals . Run it down their throat and let them know the future belongs to the Bucs .

  5. flmike Says:

    The Saints defense has given up 4 200+ rushing yards games this season.
    The Saints d is the worst rushing defense and 3rd worst passing defense, run to pass. I can see Martin putting up 190+ combined yds and 3 tds, VJax 8/120/1, MWill 6/90/1.

  6. Macabee Says:

    Just got the 2013 schedule. We play the AFC-East and the NFC-West, plus the worst team from the NFC-north and NFC-East. Will be tested again!

  7. Buc Fan #238 Says:

    What an outstanding comment!

    “…he is dropping linebackers and defensive linemen like third period Latin’,” Vitt said. ”

    I mean, that very comment will get his team rolling. But, even better, they will never forget it either. While they are trying to understand what dropping a 3rd period Latin class means, they surely won’t forget that Doug Martin is coming down hill.

    I only wish that L. Blount was in the mix. How on earth can L Blount not understand how to hit a hole? Maybe Blount really isn’t coachable at all. Wasn’t he undrafted?

  8. FLBoyInDallas Says:

    Every time Bucs fans start trumpeting how this or that opponent is the worst at something, or how the Bucs are so much better in that department, I automatically predict the opposite to happen and that usually turns out to be correct.

    The Eagles were supposed to have given up on the season. They were a turd circling the toilet bowl on the way down the drain. Uh huh. That’s when I knew the Eagles were going to win the game against all predictions.

    Now the Saints are just going to lay down and give up another 200-yard game. Right. I predict right now that Martin runs for under 100 yards and his YPC is no higher than about 4.

  9. SeanyMac in SC Says:

    Yeah, believe it or not, Joe went to a Catholic grade school growing up, and that’s where his (nightmarish) experiences with sadistic priests and old nuns getting their sexual tensions released with pointers, fists, et al, came to an end.
    Joe this is line completely classless and very offensive, and adds absolutely nothing to your article. If these nightmarish expeiences truely happened, see a shrink, but don’t write about them in this blog.

  10. nybuc Says:

    Great WR… Check….Great RB… Check….Great OL… Check…Great QB..Not!!!!

  11. Miguel El Magnifico Says:

    “Joe this line is completely classless and very offensive,”

    ” If these nightmarish experiences truly happened, see a shrink”

    I’m with Joe on this. One of the worst beatings I ever took was in a Catholic church. Kneeling in a pew, I got cold cocked by a fist behind my left ear, then grabbed by my collar, jerked into the center aisle and old, half blind Penguin, then proceeded to kick me down the aisle to the front of the church.

    The priest and 1,000 parishioners stopped and watched in horror as this enraged nun kicked and pummeled my 9 year old ass and lifted me over her head and body slammed into the front pew. Her saunter back to the rear of the church was that of a enraged Sumo wrestler. She never explained herself and it wasn’t until years later that I figured out why she beat me.

    I was wearing a blue shirt and dark blue pants that resembled the parochial students of that parish, who had to sit it the 1st three rows evidently under penalty of death. I was sitting towards the back unaware.

    I didn’t go to Catholic School. I was actually an Atheist whose parents would drop their kids off at different churches for free day care.

    So I’m with Joe, not all of our Catholic School memories are of Britney Spears in a short plaid skirt and pigtails.

  12. Catholic Joe Says:

    Dear Joe Bucs Fan “Joe”,

    You do not specify if you are a Roman Catholic or not in your post. I must say you sound like the biggest idiot. You anti-Catholic and anti-Christian diatribe is very disappointing. Please remove it quickly before others read and find out what a maroon you are.

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