Morning Cup Of Joe

May 3rd, 2019

Welcome to your Morning Cup of Joe, an eye-opener to help Joe’s readers ease into their busy workday with a few football links, wacky news and a pleasant distraction.

Distraction of the Day

Browns to get new uniforms next year. Browns also announce they will “keep FirstEnergy Stadium at its current lakefront location.” Huh? Now how the hell can you uproot and move an NFL stadium??? [Cleveland]

Tyreek Hill’s lawyer tries to pin alleged child abuse on the mother. [PFT]

Kyler Murray may not start Week 1. [USA Today]

Little late on this but what happens in Nashville when the NFL draft invades bachelorette parties. (Hint: You have a bunch of irate chicks who claim they don’t know who Dave Gettleman is.) [CBS Sports]

Florida couple has sex in front of police station. You can guess how this ended. [Local10]

Florida man walks into businesses in South Florida claiming he is a saint and that his retribution against sinners will be when he orders an army of turtles to invade civilization. [WTSP]

Not Florida: Man stuck in garbage truck. [WFLA]

Women trying to buy (?) romance online from an overseas suitor could have bank accounts emptied out. [WFTS]

5 Responses to “Morning Cup Of Joe”

  1. John Sinclear Says:

    How do you uproot and move a stadium?

    Very carefully!

  2. unbelievable Says:

    that romance scam is the new nigerian prince scam, huh?

  3. unbelievable Says:

    Also that distraction is smoking!

  4. stpetebucsfan Says:

    I do not get the bachelorette story. Yeah the city was PACKED!

    But the majority were horny young dudes boozed up out of their minds. That sounds like the ultimate “bachelorette” party.

    Maybe they didn’t go for all the costumes the drunk dudes wore.

  5. Mike Johnson Says:

    Hell Joe. Most of us men have out bank accounts emptied by our wives over a period of time….Real slow like…I’m reduced to a 12 pk and a bottle of whatever I pick out weekly.