Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

Man, if anything happens to Eddie Van Halen (God forbid!), here is his perfect replacement for Van Halen. A 14-year old girl pulls off maybe the best “Eruption” version since “The King” first played the song some 35 years ago. Amazing. [YouTube]

This video is a bit tough to watch but no less dramatic. The school that was wiped of the map by the Oklahoma tornado this week? Someone (a student?) shot video of the chaos outside what was left of the school just after the tornado passed and apparently before first responders arrived. [NewsOK]

Dixie Chicks may sign Richard Seymour. [FoxSportsSouth]

Trent Richardson is hurt. Again. [Cleveland.CBSLocal]

New Jersey bars filling top shelf liquor bottles with “swill.” No! [CBS Philly]

The playoff percentage chances for the Rays appear grim. [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

If there is a more embarrassing arrest, Joe has not heard of it. [BrowardPalmBeach]

Dude was so drunk, he didn’t see the tree he slammed into. Thought his car just blew up while on the road. [Palm Beach Post]

Killer donkeys. [Daily News]

Man, Joe feels bad for Michael Crabtree, who seemed on the verge of breaking out. [PFT]

Did Merlot Joe set up Fernando Rodney to fail yesterday? [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

Creative: Students let 10,000 crickets loose into high school. But Joe has a question: How the hell do you just obtain 10,000 crickets? [WSAZ]

So the Stalinists in the Kremlin Washington hacked into a CBS reporter’s computer, too? (Yes, Joe fully expects to be audited.) Аль хайль Ленин! [Politico]

Olivia Munn anyone? [Esquire]

Joe guesses pushing the draft back a week isn’t too awfully bad but please don’t put the combine in March. [PFT]

This is unreal video of the Moore, Okla. tornado. Storm chasers are nuts (though, a neat way to make a living) but you have to be a special kind of crazy to stare down that monster of a tornado and keep your camera rolling. [YouTube]

What was Fernando Rodney doing after he shot the moon? [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

NFL owners struggling to get fans off the couch and into the stadium now thinking about installing tablet holders at each seat. Good idea but equally smart: Slash the obscene prices to park. [USA Today]

Once upon a time, an Albert Pujols at-bat was must-watch TV. Now? Eh. And this saddens Joe. [NBCSports]

Catching an 18-foot long snake. [Palm Beach Post]

So the combine will now be held in March and the draft in May? Great. That means screwing with March Madness and more grossly inaccurate mocks from the BSPN twins, Kiper and McShay that saps actually have to pay for. [TheBigLead]

Too much Lueke. [RaysIndex]

Here is what it is like to crawl out of a hole (storm shelter) and find your entire Oklahoma city has been wiped off the map by a monster tornado, replete with haunting tornado sirens in the background.

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

You’d soil yourself too if you ate six steaks, shrimp, a birthday cake, drank a few beers and inhaled 57 cans of Reddi Whip. [WAVE]

Joe doesn’t watch music award shows, but if more people in attendance get leg-dropped like this, Joe might start. [Deadspin]

A drunk in a bar couldn’t butcher the National Anthem this badly. Carl Lewis is outraged. [YouTube]

NASCAR won the weekend with this ad. [TheBigLead]

So Buffalo’s offense (the Bills, that is) is easier than Florida State’s? No wonder the Bills have been so miserable! [PFT]

It seems Wil Myers has just a bit of an attitude problem. [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

Man files suit claiming he was poisoned with Budweiser. [WPXI]

Talk about a buzzkill: Man dies after having sex with an active hornets nest. [IBTimes]

Mean Joe Green likes Ndamukong Suh. [Freep]

You know how some delusional Bucs fans hate Team Glazer because they own a kickball team? Well, the opposite is happening in Boston where the kickball crowd is mad at Bob Kraft, arguing he puts too much emphasis on the Patriots. [Boston]

The sad ending to Dick Trickle [TheBigLead]

You are not supposed to catch a home run ball with your grill. [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

Indoor football coach levels an opposing player and, predictably, WWE ensues. [TheBigLead]

Charging a wild elephant unarmed doesn’t seem to be very intelligent. [YouTube]

If you are into fantasy football stuff, then Dwayne Bowe claims you will want to draft him. [KC Star]

This is a no-brainer: Bernard Pollard is going to get audited. [Baltimore.CBSLocal]

It seems Joel Peralta likes salsa bands in the clubhouse. Is this how David Price threw out his arm? [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

Why does LeSean McCoy hate women? [TheBigLead]

This is now how to ride a motorcycle. [YouTube]

Notre Dame is “chicken.” Joe just hopes when the Irish don’t play Big Blue, they at least play Florida State and develop a rivalry in the ACC. [MLive]

Vikings new crib. Whattya think? (Yes, they will now get a Super Bowl before Tampa Bay will.) [Vikings]

If Yunel Escobar is not going to run hard to first, not field and, well, not hit, bench his arse! [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

Derrick Ward must have had a really bad Mother’s Day. [Twitter]

Disturbing: Illinois man arrested for sexually molesting a peacock. [Daily Herald]

Former Jags star receiver Jimmy Smith is doing time in a Mississippi hole for various felonies. [TheBigLead]

Study claims iPads will give you a heart attack. [Bloomberg]

So now the feds are wiretapping reporters’ phones? How Soviet of them. Buddy Nix is outraged. [AP]

The more you learn about Titus Young, the more you expect him to die an old man while incarcerated. [PFT]

What bullpen woes? [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

How to p!ss away a promising NFL career, this time authored by Titus Young. [NFL]

Couple pinched for driving van packed with stolen potato chips. [ClickOrlando]

So Roger Goodell wants the Dolphins to stay in Miami. You don’t say? [PFT]

D.J. Hayden takes to a field for the first time since he nearly died on a football field. [Contra Costa Times]

Relive Dirtbag’s memorable game-winning blast. [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

Cheerleader triplets! [TheBigLead]

Cops pull a guy over who runs away and hides in a gator-infested lake. You can do the math. [WTSP]

Guy goes nuts at a powder puff football game. [Palm Beach Post]

Throwing eggs at a courthouse = pinched. [NBC Miami]

Bicycle-riding bear ditches bike to eat a bicycle-riding monkey. Yes, you read that correctly. [YouTube]

Finally someone is heckling Yunel Escobar. [RaysIndex]

Start your day with the Morning Cup of Joe from HootersCalendar.com. And don’t forget to visit HootersCalendar.com for amazing videos, pictures and cool gifts. It’s Joe’s second favorite website.

Bucs news forthcoming.

The choking at Wrigley Field continues. [TheBigLead]

Vikings going back to their rightful roots (outdoors) for at least two seasons. [Star Tribune]

Stephen Ross and his crew sure are a whining lot. [Miami Herald]

Von Miller: stud football player, chicken farmer. [PFT]

Finally, someone in the Rays bullpen can pitch. [RaysIndex]