THE PESSIMIST: What The Hell Is Going On?February 27th, 2009
THE PESSIMIST can hear Vince Lombardi screaming right now, from those classic NFL Films, throwing his rolled up playbook to the ground.
THE PESSIMIST wants to start cursing and throwing things right now. Right at Mark Dominik. But THE PESSIMIST can’t. He’s at work and would get fired for such a stunt in a professional environment.
Good grief, THE PESSIMIST just can’t believe what is going on! First Dominik runs out the classiest act in the NFL (two actually) and a few hours later trades — willingly! — draft picks to get this mental midget jerk Kellen Winslow, Jr., like the Bucs don’t already have enough terribly underperforming spawns of Hall of Fame players.
Winslow… really Dominik??? What, you are trying to upgrade the character of the Bucs by (potentially) replacing a five-star a-hole (no, not Alex Rodriguez) like the King of Turds for a four-star a-hole??? The guy who thinks he’s some dime store Green Beret, cheap shot artist and mentally challenged six-year old kid all rolled into one?
Why do you think Eric (Not So Much Of A) Mangenius wanted no part of this walking injury report? Let’s take a peak at this moron’s brief football career:
When at the (eff) U, Winslow freaks out after a game, telling one and all he’s some sort of Audie Murphy in cleats, screaming to one and all how he’s “a solider!” and that football is “war!”
Meanwhile, real men fighting a real war protecting our freedom are being shot and killed by those animals that fly planes into buildings and behead people.
Yeah, some solider you are Winslow!
Then there’s the time when Sgt. Winslow was drafted by the Browns, he decided to reach out to his inner child (not much of a stretch), buy a crotch rocket and blow out a knee popping wheelies in a parking lot.
Then, two years ago on national television playing the Steelers on NFL Network, Sgt. Winslow has one of the all-time late hit of late hits on Steelers linebacker James Farrior. It was so terrible, players were walking to their huddles. It was so out of hand, Chris Collingsworth belted out to Sgt. Winslow, “Yeah, I know you’re supposed to a solider and everything but you have got to use your head!”
Sorry Chris. That’s hard for Sgt. Winslow to do since he had no head to use.
And now the Bucs have this jerk. Nice, real nice.
MEMO TO THE GLAZER BOYS: Will you please tell your employees they are not to, under any additional circumstances, trade for any more failed sons of Hall of Famers. Please!
What the hell is happening to our Bucs? THE PESSIMIST demands an explanation and there better not be one freaking reference to “The Plan.”